Advice

HOLY F*CK: RELATIONSHIPS AS A PATH TO ENLIGHTENMENT

Posted on by Alexandra Roxo

In her latest Holy F*ck column, Alexandra Roxo finds herself on the path to enlightenment with relationships coach Perri Gorman…

Holy fuck relationships as path to enlightenment perri gorman alexandra roxo on The Numinous
Lettin’ my hair go full Leo in the Croatian sun…

I met Perri Gorman when someone who I had met once messaged me on Facebook and was like: “I think you would like this teacher.” Perri was leading something called a “Relationship Detox,” and it DID seem appropriate, since I had decided to take a six month break from sex, dating, alcohol and drugs to focus on my healing. But then again, randoms send me FB messages all the time so I couldn’t be sure.

When I got Perri on the phone she was INTENSE. I’m an intense woman too, so when I come head to head with another of my kind I can adopt a “been there done that” attitude. Like, “Oh yeah, I’m not afraid to look at my shadows. I do it all the time.” And “Um duh. I’ve done the work.” But somehow she convinced me to sign up for her class. And it was the best gift ever. She called me out on places I had been hiding from my truth and still living from deep rooted childhood fears. (Ugh when does it end????!) At the end of the class I felt palpable changes. Like major shifts. Like, I had looked at all of my uglies in the face and hugged them and given them space to, well…turn into butterflies. Cheesy, yes, but true!

I sat down with Perri to try and understand this alchemical process a little deeper.

Alexandra Roxo: Your website says “TRANSFORMATION IS NOT OPTIONAL” in huge letters which kinda freaks me out but in a good way. Why did you choose that?
Perri Gorman: It’s a bit of a story. When I was living in Hong Kong back in 2007 my life felt like Ground Hog’s day. I had actually hit a certain level of success, but I was like “Is this IT? Like, Is THIS my life?” I had a magnet on my refrigerator that was my savior, which said: “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.” Oh, I must be in a cocoon I used to think. This part sucks. But just hang in there! After my life began to transform (longer story), my online moniker became and still is Bethebutterfly, and the butterfly is my inspirational creature.

Later, I went to a lecture by someone who was also fascinated by the life of the butterfly. She told a story of going to a butterfly farm and asking the keeper; “Does the caterpillar have a choice?” The answer was no. They either transform or they die. It’s not optional. And in this life, I think it is similar for us. Sounds grim but the stakes are really that high.

AR: I agree, and I also feel like the world needs transformation more than ever. Which is what I experienced on your relationship detox course. It’s hard for me to describe how you work though. It’s alchemy! Can you explain?
PG: Well, I am a guide and I create experiences. I walk people down a path that I have been down to and experienced transformation myself. If I haven’t been able to personally alchemize it (whatever “it” might be) I don’t create the experience. Rather than teaching, I help my students facilitate this in themselves. This part is really important. Often if you just “tell” people something, then either the Ego rejects it and can’t hear it—or the Ego hears it, rejects it and turns on you in the process! So in order to stun the ego, you have to guide the spirit and let the “aha” moments come naturally.

Each person has a different speed at which they transform, too. Mine was REALLY slow—partly because I had so much pain inside, it wasn’t safe for it to come out all at once. It was a process. Think of it like detoxing from chemicals. Since your body stores toxins in your fat cells, it won’t actually LET you lose weight too fast if you are toxic because it would poison the body. Awakening is similar. There is a massive pain body that you need to work through in order to open fully.

With the Relationship Detox specifically, it is designed to reframe your entire experience with relationships and have you see the divine messages that meant for you in each experience. By going through the process you are able to let go of behavior that is no longer serving you and choose something new.

Holy fuck relationships as path to enlightenment perri gorman alexandra roxo on The Numinous
Perri Gorman: relationships guru

AR: In the moments you’re coaching me I always start “strong” and then you get in there and crack me open. How do you always manage to do that?!
PG: I think a big part of my work is feeling “you” underneath the “strong,” which is usually a defense mechanism. It’s there to say “yeah I’m cool, nothing to see here, keep moving!” But if you listen closely there is another voice in there saying, “Hey! Don’t listen to her! I’m in here!”

My work is not for the faint of heart as you know, and I think it’s unique because I live it deeply myself. I am not perfect or enlightened but I have a deep deep practice of looking at my own stuff in every situation. I have unwound some really complex and tricky (and not so attractive) patterns in myself, so I can see the patterns more easily than others in many cases. So if you are like me and you have patterns that fog or trick other people, you come to me and I slice the head off that puppy and you feel so much better!

AR: So how is a relationship a crucible? That sounds scary as hell.
PG: Relationship as a crucible means that you don’t do this fairy tale thing of “acquiring” a relationship and then passing out back to sleep. It means staying conscious within the relationship, and being willing for it to “burn” the patterns in you that no longer serve you. It means looking deeply at the other person as a mirror and using that mirror to look at where you can be a better version of yourself.

AR: Yes! I find the deepest work I do is often in partnership. It’s like boot camp. No hiding! Wanna give us an example of what this can look like?
PG: Sure. Right now in my own relationship (I am getting married in October) I am working on a pattern where I try to fix him when he is down because his pain makes me really uncomfortable. So instead of letting him have his experience, I do things that would make him feel better. That sounds like the “nice” thing to do but it is not the “kind” thing to do. The thing to do is focus on myself, support him how he wants to be supported and not need him to be any way other than how he is.

As I started to look more deeply at it, I was like “Why do I do that? Where does that pattern originate?” It comes from childhood and being afraid that things going wrong were my fault and not wanting to get in trouble. But if I fixed it then that meant I did something good! It’s a rescuer pattern where I get personal validation that I am a good person by making him feel better.

But if we are practicing being conscious, then I have robbed him of his down which it is NECESSARY for him to get through himself to get to the freedom on the other side. By trying to help him feel better, (i.e. distract him from his feelings or helping him cover them with yummy things like a chocolate milkshake) I have helped him numb out and I have kept him from feeling what he needs to feel. So I notice it and then I actively practice doing something different so I can shift that piece of myself internally. It’s a practice.

Holy fuck relationships as path to enlightenment perri gorman alexandra roxo on The Numinous

AR: I love this, and I’ve been on both sides of this same coin. Allowing the uncomfortable is tough. People are always looking to “be ok.” But I wonder if some of us are avoiding the shadow. The truth. The messy side. Hiding under a mask of “zen.”
PG: We all have masks and patterns, which is why relationships as reflection from others is so important. I surround myself with people who can penetrate my defenses so the truth can get through. Of course we avoid it. I don’t think that I ever said “Oh hey, I want to be awake and spiritual.” I was a fucking walking ball of chaos and destruction, and I had no choice. It was transform or die. I had to learn how to use all the energy. For others, they feel dead inside or their relationships don’t work or they are bored. In this sense, it’s like we all have different locks that require a different key.

***

So there you have it. Perri always pisses me off with our work, but then she breaks me down and then I cry and feel so happy and see the light!  It’s an amazing process if you surrender to it.

And next up from Perri: self-love. Something I think gets misunderstood A LOT. Self-love doesn’t just mean treating yourself to a mani pedi. It means cutting off toxic relationships. Releasing self-judgment. Body shame. Sexual shame. Owning your voice. Standing up for your needs. Creating healthy boundaries. Self-love is deep. I’m still learning it more and more everyday.

Perri’s new experience, PRESENCE, is all about coming home to yourself through the path authentic self-love. Not in the “everything needs to be good and nice” kind of way, more like “I will sit here with you through it all—good or bad”—something she admits has been one of the most challenging practices for her, and so a major focus of her own healing journey.

Registration for PRESENCE opens August 1 for a limited time. To sign-up, and to learn more about Perri Gorman and her work visit: Theschoolofalchemy.com

A SENSORY EXPLORATION OF LEO SEASON

Posted on by Bess Matassa

Leo season is an invitation to shimmy onto the dancefloor and unleash your realness, say Cara George & Bess Matassa of Mojave Rising…

mojave leo season on The Numinous
Kali Uchis

Leo season grabs us by both hands and pulls us onto the dance floor to shake and shimmy with the sweet sensation that all we have to do is become more of what we already are. Yet the fluorescent feline’s secret jewel box lies buried within the deliciously difficult feeling that when we show up as ourselves, absolutely and completely, sometimes we dance alone, lit only by the fire of our realest, most generously unapologetic essence.

We’re not for everyone—but we cannot be for anyone if we’re not for ourselves. So turn it on, turn it up, and shine your light as you step into the strobe-lit center of your own incandescent value, powered by the sheer deliciousness of being. The message, glamourama glitter kittens, is that it’s alright to trust this life, even when it leaves us to bask alone in our own glow. Because we’ve got to let it show and it’s time for the world to know.

The keyword: Realness

The song lyrics: “What you find/What you feel/What you know now/To be real”—Cheryl Lynn, To Be Real. And check out our Leo season playlist, complete with bubblegum pop, heart-on-sleeve anthems, and glittering grooves.

Leo season mojave rising on The Numinous
Leo lady Cara Delevigne

The color palette: Fully saturated jewel tones and glowy, sun-kissed shades—think gold lamé, mouthwatering magentas, and torrid corals.

The style: Lisa Frank and a Vegas showgirl vacation in the tropics—think over-the-top sparkles, shine, fluff, bronzer, silliness, sex and, of course, rainbow leopard print.

The scents and flavors: Sunbaked and succulent—think juicy tomatoes, citrus collisions, tropical infusions, and ice cream dreams. Think coconut La Croix, gourmand scents, Caprese salad, and creamsicles.

mojave rising

The healing: It’s glamorously direct and deliciously simple—go for rollerskating, drugstore makeovers, beachfront carnivals, shared popsicles, or anything that offers full, earnest immersion in the precious present.

SENSUOUS INVITATION OF THE MONTH :: UN-GUILTY PLEASURES (by sign, below)

With this month’s pack of Leo planets beckoning us to become more completely ourselves than ever before, and Mars finally out of retrograde and moving from Scorpio into Sagittarius, we’re being asked to recommit to what turns us on and lights us up, even when our pleasures might be perceived as “uncool.”

This month, we invite you to abandon “good” taste and strip the supposedly guilty of its guilt as you dive heart first into the gaudy, tacky, sentimental, and over-the-top. Start with the suggestions below and then let your imagination run absolutely wild into pure, guileless pleasure, no matter its reputation.

mojave rising leo season on The Numinous
Nicki Minaj

::  ARIES ::
Leo season invites you to infuse your stripped down, embattled spirit with some larger-than-life glamorama and tenderized sweetness. Un-guilty Pleasure: Talk about love and feel it all with Celine Dion’s heart-wrenching, vocal acrobatics.

:: TAURUS ::
Leo season invites you to savor ephemeral pleasures that can’t be tied down or objectified, and to trust so deeply into your worth that you have nothing to lose. Un-guilty Pleasure: Divine the cosmic messages in lottery tickets, happy meal prizes, and boardwalk palm readers just like you would a serious tarot session with a seasoned professional.

:: GEMINI ::
Leo season invites you to utilize your endless penchant for information gathering to playfully and emotionally relate to others’ stories. Un-guilty Pleasure: Old-school slumber parties complete with Cosmo quizzes and rounds of “Never Have I Ever.”

:: CANCER ::
Leo season invites you to own your need for retreat and not wait for permission to feed the secret parts of your soul. Un-guilty Pleasure: Slip away and tuck yourself in with a solo Snuggie and Yankee candle.

:: LEO ::
Leo season invites you to glow, glam, and shine without worrying about who’s watching. Un-guilty Pleasure: Break out the bedazzler and blue eyeshadow and take yourself out for a romantic Olive Garden pasta dinner for one.

:: VIRGO ::
Leo season invites you to step into the scorching-hot spotlight as you rightfully claim full credit for your behind-the-scenes labors. Un-guilty Pleasure: Karaoke lounge night without opting for the private room; think ABBA, Barry Manilow, and beyond.  

:: LIBRA ::
Leo season invites you to trade the shoulds for the wants as you release into multiple versions of the ideal. Un-guilty Pleasure: Challenge your sense of acceptable aesthetics as you celebrate inspirational kitten and sunset photos, colored bras under white shirts, or even toe rings.

:: SCORPIO ::
Leo season invites you to find the juicy humor in your emotional intensity without having to scale it back one single bit. Un-guilty Pleasure: Binge on soap operas and reality shows where the drama runs high; think Melrose, The O.C., and The Real Housewives.

:: SAGITTARIUS ::
Leo season invites you to relax fully in the present moment of courageous creation without having to imbue it with philosophical meaning or needing to sniff out what may be next in line. Un-guilty Pleasure: Get wild and weird with jazzercise, prancercise, square dancing, or line dancing.

:: CAPRICORN ::
Leo season invites you to suspend some of your hard-earned perspective for the deliciously innocent belief that you’re worthy of being adored without having to exercise any effort. Un-guilty Pleasure: Adorn your living space with some Liberace-style “palatial kitsch”: gold- plated picture frames, red velvet lamps, and pink cherubic statues.

:: AQUARIUS ::
Leo season invites you to feel fully into the arduous heat of passionate attachments and let them burn and burn. Un-guilty Pleasure: Start a Nicholas Sparks’ book club and cry your damn eyes out with the ephemeral human beauty of it all.

:: PISCES ::
Leo season invites you to assert yourself completely without needing to ask permission. Un-guilty Pleasure: Clear the dance floor with a show-stopping boogie down to the smooth, mellow sounds of Michael McDonald’s yacht rock.

EMPOWERED ACTION IN THE FACE OF TRAUMA

Posted on by Louise Androlia

Recent world events have stirred up many emotions. Louise Androlia shares her wisdom on how to use our feelings as a catalyst for empowered action…. Images: Katya Volpato

empowered action people hugging by Katya Volpato on The Numinous

Recent world events have left many of us feeling traumatized, whether or not we’ve been directly affected by acts of mass violence. These are turbulent times, and having been working on my own path to trauma recovery recently, I feel called to share some thoughts on how to work on being present in reality—but at the same time not becoming immobilized by fear.

At the root of it all, whether facing our own crisis or confronted with mass crisis, the difficult art to master is that it is safe to feel our feelings and continue to connect, especially when we feel as though it would be wiser to shut down.

The strong emotions being stirred up among switched on communities now are actually a valuable call to action. Here are some ways we can use them—while avoiding losing our connection to our highest selves, or getting swept up in the hype.

THE EMOTION: Overwhelmed
THE GUIDANCE: You can’t save the whole world at once
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Focus your attention

Pick something you currently feel very passionate or perhaps frightened about, and then learn and feel your way through it. Endless browsing through social media feeds may make you feel more frustrated because you also end up reading the comments, which can lead to yet more overwhelm. Instead, choose to focus on your chosen subject and learn all you can. Yes this will be hard if you are used to endless scrolling—because as well as learning, you are re-training your mind to be present.

THE EMOTION: Fear
THE GUIDANCE: Catastrophizing only fuels the fears
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Get involved in local politics and community

Looking on Facebook lately, all I’ve seen is people screaming into the Internet abyss about the apocalypse and giving fuel to their own fear and sadness in the process. This helps no one, including you. So look at how you can actually get involved within your community, and if you don’t see anything obvious, start something. It is so easy to just say ‘Fuck the world’. But this is not the time to give up. It’s time to shout louder, IRL, and to remember your voice and your vote DOES count.

THE EMOTION: Anger
THE GUIDANCE: Do not fight fire with fire
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Feel your anger; then channel it into positive action

The elements can always teach us something—for example, anger is a fire element emotion, while compassion and feelings are water element emotions. And you don’t put out a forest fire by setting another part of the forest on fire! Action, and so activism, is a positive channel for anger, and if what’s needed now is more of the water element, become an activist for love, compassion, equality, empathy, and connection.

empowered action people hugging by Katya Volpato on The Numinous

THE EMOTION: Grief
THE GUIDANCE: It is safe to feel your feelings
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Explore and nurture your shadow side

Man of us are experiencing a huge collective sense of grief, coming in all forms, and for anybody not used to this emotion, this level of pain can seem very frightening to the mind, body and spirit. This is not a time to numb the pain, but instead an opportunity to dive deeper in your own self-inquiry practice. Checking out of reality serves no one, including you. Allow yourself to acknowledge and feel all the fears that have arisen recently and know that it is okay to do so. It can sometimes feel like our own personal crises are not ‘bad’ enough to warrant being the focus of our compassion—but ignoring your own pain will leave you unable to serve. By learning to compassionately address what is currently coming up for you, then you are actually helping to heal the collective and creating connection between yourself, your peers and those strangers you are really feeling for.

THE EMOTION: Helplessness
THE GUIDANCE: Re-connect to yourself
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Take a media break

First of all, avoid watching or reading the mainstream news on a loop. Studies show that when we keep recycling the news over and over we are re-traumatizing constantly. And the more scared we feel, the more helpless we can feel. To be able to start being of service it is essential that we learn to reconnect to our selves, as once back in the present moment we feel more stable to help others. I’ve also lost count of how many people I hear saying they wish they could use social media less, as this can have a similar way of hooking us into judgment and fear, and distancing us from our own truths. The great news is…you can!

Some easy ways to start:

  • Leave your phone at home and go for a walk in your neighborhood.
  • Put your phone on airplane mode at night.
  • Create a ‘no social media after ***pm’ rule.
  • Log out of all your social media channels on your computer and phone. This means that when you go to use them you become aware that you have to login. This allows using them to become intentional.
  • Move your social icons on your phone to a folder and put it on the last page of scrolling. Again this means you CHOOSE when to look rather than it just being there.
  • Do not read the comments. I repeat DO NOT READ THE COMMENTS.

These small actions may feel massively uncomfortable, and if so, good. If you feel anxious without your phone, good. The present moment will continue to feel painful until you learn to be IN it. And look how much time you now have! What would you like to do with it? I suggest reconnecting to PLAY. Connecting with your inner child is another way to ease anxiety and help you reconnect to your natural energy of love and connection. When you refresh your true north, you are more likely to be able to shift your helplessness into self-love.

empowered action people hugging by Katya Volpato on The Numinous

THE EMOTION: Frustration
THE GUIDANCE: Express yourself in the way that works for you
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Show don’t tell

It can be really hard to express yourself in a way that you feel helps, especially when you’re angry and upset. It’s good to remember that we rarely get our point across when we try and force it upon someone and so preaching doesn’t usually feel good. You will always feel better when you can express yourself articulately and if you find it difficult to feel confidence with expressing yourself with words, remember also that you can always just BE the change. We always positively affect those around us with our behavior. So think: what small steps can you take in your day-to-day life that will provide example of the kind of world you’d like to live in?

*** 

A Final Word on Black Lives Matter. Vs All Lives Matter.

This is an argument that’s been raging, and below are a few of my favorite simple ways to explain the situation to someone who is having trouble understanding. It is part of human nature to make everything about ourselves (regardless of the topic) since in times of trauma our survival instinct kicks in. But it’s important to learn to recognize that not EVERYTHING is about us. The more that we can see ourselves connected to everyone else, the more empathy we can ignite.

  • “When we say ‘Save the Rainforests’, it doesn’t mean that all other forests suck.”
  • “Choosing to go to a rally for Breast Cancer does not mean that Liver Cancer is less important.”
  • “Saving an animal that’s about to go extinct does not mean that other animals aren’t important, it just means that right now, this one needs our help.”
  • “Yes, of course all lives are important, but currently it doesn’t feel like black lives are as important as other lives—and until the world is equal, meaning ALL people receive the same level of kindness and judicial treatment, then we need to speak up.”
  • “Choosing to support black lives does not mean your life is any less significant.”

You get the idea.

TEMPLE OF VENUS: DRESSING FOR YOUR BIRTH CHART

Posted on by Elyssa Jakim

In her latest Temple of Venus column, Elyssa Jakim shares how to magnetize your star quality by dressing for your birth chart…

Elyssa Jakim dressing for your birth chart on The Numinous
Dressing in red for my Aries Sun sign

Personal style—that Venus-ruled, ever-elusive, je ne sais quoi that some people seem to exude and others find totally elusive. Is this something we’re born with? Can it be cultivated?

I have always been a clotheshorse and a believer in the power of dress to transform and heal us. But when I graduated college, I suddenly felt shy with my fashion choices, and didn’t completely trust myself to choose what worked and what didn’t. My embarrassment and confusion around this reflected a general insecurity that I was feeling, a very poignant and painful: “what the f*ck am I doing with my life?” kind of insecurity.

I began to find my stride in life and fashion as I turned toward healing as a path. Fast forward to a one-on-one shamanic healing training, during which my teacher told me: “You need to wear a bra sometimes.” Yes, really!

She also pointed out that I seemed to be hiding myself under too-loose pieces. I realized that her focus on dress was her way of encouraging me to feel my femininity, my sexuality, my radiance, my strength, and my beauty. And this is what Venus teaches us—that our clothing helps us cultivate our grace and sense of higher/inner self.

Meanwhile, I came across Kimberly Peta Dewhirst of Star Sign Style, an astrologer who helps people navigate the fashion and aesthetics of the zodiac, after she wrote a Numinous article about dressing for your Venus sign. And since Venus is my homegirl, I soon became obsessed and had to know more.

So Kimberly and I sat down for a reading and an in-depth discussion on the astrological tenets of style. She taught me that we are absolutely born with a style and that yes, it really IS personal. “The symbols of the zodiac are archetypes that translate further through color, accessories, image, patterns and attitude. Fashion is a metaphor for who we are, and astrology—the circle of the birth chart—is who we are,” she says.

As such, your chart, an imprint of the moment you were born, contains valuable clues about how to dress completely as yourself—and rather than blindly follow trends, to use fashion to enhance the traits that make us naturally irresistible, and completely comfortable in our skin.

During a reading Kimberly uses the birth chart as a starting point to identify key style signifiers, going on to create a style prescription based on the aspects at play—providing a mood board with images and inspirational celebrities: “That’s a big part of what I do—helping people to relate to their character through the style of the stars,” she says.

For those of us who don’t follow celebrity culture, this may seem irrelevant, but Kimberly insists that: “We all identify with public figures, their struggles, relationship patterns and mode of expression. Beyond the gossip mags, we need to work with these heroes because they tell us who we are—they’re our mirror, in a way.”

My personal style icons, mapped on my chart
My personal style icons, as mapped on my chart

Kimberly has a full style guide for each zodiac sign on her website—and there follows an overview of the key points to consider when dressing, a la Venus, for your chart.

:: RISING SIGN ::
The key is to dress for your rising sign, not your Sun—since the rising sign speaks to the outer personality that you present to the world. This makes it the sign to lean into when making a first impression. My Scorpio rising means I can come across private and secretive, so I do well in styles that shroud me in mystery. Black and deep reds are the colors of this sign, and because Scorpio is the sign of all things unknowable—the occult, taboo sex, other people’s resources, death, and rebirth—it speaks to a dark glamour, suggesting much hidden under the surface.

Elyssa dressing for her Scorpio rising sign
Rocking my Scorpio Rising, as compiled by Kimberly

:: SUN SIGN ::
The sun is the brightest star in the sky, and as such we often really resonate with our Sun sign which can feel like our “superpower” sign. With my Sun in Aries, a Mars-ruled sign, I can experiment with power dressing and also wearing brighter reds. Attention-seeking Aries rules the head, so can I can also wear statement headgear—which I always have! Kimberly suggested that because of how my Sun sits with the rest of my chart, I can lean into this Aries boldness, and rather than overpowering it will be luminous.

:: MOON SIGN ::
It’s really fun to dress for your Moon, since this represents your emotional core—what makes you feel comfortable, and “at home” (in fact this could hint at your preferred behind-closed-doors style). With my Moon in Scorpio too, no wonder I feel so safe and grounded in black. And when I’m at home, I love to wear a barely-there silk or satin dress, which makes me feel sensual, but is more mysterious than no clothes at all.

:: VENUS SIGN ::
Venus represents how we like to spend money, make friends, flirt, and how we dress to impress. She’s also the sign of beauty, so whenever you align with your Venus, you’re going to feel more beautiful. My Venus in Gemini adds a fun curveball to my fashion sense, since Gemini is a light, mischievous imp—a fairy that’s gone into the dress-up box and come out in a mishmash of sequins and stripes! She likes butterflies and magic dust and is attracted to jewels like a magpie. This has me mixing all types of patterns, wearing pink and babydoll dresses, and generally choosing playful and conversation-provoking pieces (Gemini’s a talker).

:: MARS SIGN ::
If Venus is more about flirting than sex, which is the domaine of passionate Mars. Mars rules our personal power place, and our deep, primal urges. So dressing for a night out on the prowl? Get cozy with your Mars sign. You can also totally dress for the gym in your Mars, which is how we assert our energy. My Mars in hard-working Capricorn means I feel sexy in clothes that are chic, understated, tailored, and just so. Think pantsuits, black lace, button down shirts. Ditto when I want to GET IT DONE, I happen to love white button down shirts at work.

Kimberly also pointed out that I kind of look like a lion, hello Leo Midheaven!
Kimberly also pointed out that I kind of look like a lion, hello Leo Midheaven!

:: THE MIDHEAVEN ::
The Midheaven is the impression we give off before people have met us. It’s our reputation and the spirit that precedes us. Oftentimes, our Midheaven is connected to the tenth house of fame and honors. It flavors our career. It’s how we come across on social media, which is a good starting place for personal branding. I have my midheaven in Leo, which means I am a natural thespian (I pursued acting for the first 25 years of my life). Leo is also proud, and can look regal with gold trimmings (especially about their face), baroque touches, crests, and crowns—hair can be styled to reflect this also, and I would definitely call my hair my crowning glory!

:: PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER ::
Through investigating all of these aspects of your chart, you can get a clearer sense of how you can dress as your most alluring, confident and authentic self. Even if you’re intimidated by the idea of dressing for some aspects of your chart, you may find that, through dress, it becomes easier to embody that part of yourself. Then you’re living more fully. And from this place of fullness, your style, like the perfect outfit, can come together seamlessly.

Kimberly is available for personal style consultations via starsignstyle.com or email: [email protected].

Need more Venus inspiration? Check out Elyssa’s last Temple of Venus column on water magic.

THE MOON SIGNS AT WORK IN YOUR CAREER

Posted on by The Numinous

Sarah Gottesdiener, the artist behind the cult Many Moons workbook, breaks down how your Moon Sign plays a role in your career. PLUS! Numinous readers receive free shipping on of her site through July 13. Use the code: NUMI

IMAGE1

Some astrologers believe that your Moon sign reflects your most essential self, your intuitive make-up, your emotions and innate talents. As such, for any entrepreneur—where what you “do” is a fluid reflection of who you are—a connection to your Moon sign is essential.

For example, having my Moon in Gemini (with Cancer Sun and a Taurus Ascendent), could  explain why I’m obsessed with research and reading, and why my childhood dream was to illustrate and write children’s books. Also why, as an adult, I have many interests and endless subjects I am curious about, while almost everything I do professionally requires some form of communication, whether it is design, writing, or reading people’s Tarot cards.

Day-to-day, my Gemini Moon means I can be funny, charming, witty, and engaging. It is easy for me to communicate what I intuit, and to utilize messages from spirit and channeling while I give Tarot readings or write. All my clients know how much I love to chat and talk things out!

But I also have a moody side, to be sure, and having many different pursuits can also lead to feeling scattered, which in turn affects my nervous system and adrenals. I’ve also experienced having people think that my flirting is more than just a fun exchange.

For my Gemini Moon, as well as the smooth running of my business, serving my body through physical exercise is really important to me, and my nervous system. As is drinking enough water, meditating, getting enough sleep, and listening to my body. I did not do this at all until my 30’s—and if there is one piece of advice I could give to any person running their own business, it would be to prioritize this kind of practical self-care!

Below, I share some wisdom for each Moon sign at work…

Sarah’s Many Moons workbook has attracted a cult following

:: ARIES MOON ::
At your very best you are pure fire water, a flickering flame of warrior inspiration. Bold and brazen, most likely you are a natural leader. Put your ideas out there—they are almost always completely unique to your vibrant vision, and usually serve the greater good. Just know that patience, long-term commitment, and compromise are parts of the process.

:: TAURUS MOON ::
The Moon is exalted in loyal, steady Taurus, and financial fortune may favor you. Try to flex your manifesting muscles, particularly with Earth-related projects and possessions: tangibility is the name of your game. The key here is making sure your self-worth is strong, and that you feel emotionally secure, with all sensory modes intact and engaged. Accepting how lovely you are, inside and out, is the key to sharing and spreading and harvesting more harmony.

:: GEMINI MOON ::
Curious, whip smart, lively Gemini Moon! Overanalyzing and over-communicating your emotions will not help you: utilizing your strong gift of communication to engage others will. The need for variety is strong; spreading out your many intriguing versatilities amongst different projects and groups is a way to keep interest piqued.

:: CANCER MOON ::
Sweet Cancer Moon, what a kind delight you are. With your Moon in this placement you are most likely emphatic, supportive and sensitive. As the Moon rules Cancer, there could be a strong chance you are psychic, a healer, a deep nurturer. It is imperative that you address your own emotional desires and boundaries, and the needs of your highest self before taking on the energy of others.

:: LEO MOON ::
Liberated, passionate, Leo Moon! You expect r-e-s-p-e-c-t, you regal, royal creature. And you deserve it: when you share and give to those you love, they feel lit up with all the shining force and power of the Sun. Incorporate your natural gifts for play, dramatic flair, and creative expression as much as possible when you lead the pack.

:: VIRGO MOON ::
Virgo Moons are naturals at writing and analyzing. Health, healing, and self-care is of upmost importance to those of you with a Virgo Moon: don’t forget that tending to your SELF must take precedence. You could be happy to be working behind the scenes, since being of service is a natural state for you. When things are organized and well-structured, the sky is the limit for you.

modern women projects moon dress moon signs on The Numinous
Photo: Seth Gottesdiener

:: LIBRA MOON ::
The emphasis for those with a Libra Moon is emotional and inner balance. Harmony, peace, and beauty are a priority to you: Libra is ruled by Venus, after all. You might be straight up gifted at art-direction, hosting, and anything that involves grace and design. While you are at your best around others, don’t let the perception of having to cater to others’ needs swallow yours whole.

:: SCORPIO MOON ::
Scorpio Moon: passionate, penetrating, and powerful! Part of your lifelong struggle may be dealing with the “feelings vs. facts” equation that all emotionally vibrant, attuned beings on this weird rock of ours must reckon with. But when you’ve poured your endless energy into something you care deeply about, there is no stopping you. With the suggestion of psychic and intuitive gifts here, you might be a psychologist, an investigator, healer, a change-maker, a trail-blazer.

:: SAGITTARIUS MOON ::
Teacher, preacher, permanent student, wanderer, brutal optimist: those with a Moon placement in this sign do not want to be pinned down. You want to inspire and be inspired. You want to wake others up and expand your own limits. Design your life and work so that your love and passions get expressed through metaphoric or actual travel and different perspectives.

:: CAPRICORN MOON ::
A Capricorn Moon most likely will have no trouble paying the bills, advancing in a larger company, and thriving in a long-term relationship. You are high-achieving, capable, reliable, and realistic: what a wonderful relief in this flaky day and age! Let your impeccable standards serve as an example to others, and not a harsh expectation, an excuse for flagellation. Let others catch a glimpse of your huge and warm heart sooner than you might feel comfortable.

:: AQUARIUS MOON ::
A big advantage you have is your ability to see the bigger picture: the collective is an easy point of access for you. Your propensity towards originality and the avant-garde is a gift. Your vision is future-forward, wide, expansive, celestial—at times you might even feel like an alien observer. Put your formidable intellect to use and help us turn the page towards progress.

:: PISCES MOON ::
Those born with their Moon in Pisces are lovers, sweethearts, romantics, idealists, dreamers, and old-souls. You might have heightened gifts in multiple art forms. Nurture your creativity and helping nature, give it the time and space it deserves. Use the urge towards escapism in a healthy way by recharging in the wild, making art, and through channeling. Show us the value of your subtle power.

YOGI SAYS: ”HOW CAN I BE OF SERVICE?”

Posted on by Eddie Stern

In a new column, yogi and philosopher Eddie Stern offers advice from a yogic perspective—with additional guidance from the tarot. This month’s question: “How can I be of service?” Artwork: Lucy Dyer 

artwork by Lucy Dyer on The Numinous

QUESTION: “All the recent socio-political unrest has left me feeling equal parts vulnerable and impotent. Alongside feelings of fear about what the future holds (environmental issues obviously play into this also), there is a huge sense of compassion for communities who’ve been affected directly and a newfound depth of empathy for all the displaced and marginalized people in the world. This has stirred up a desire to want to help in some tangible way, but it’s so hard to know where to start—and to not feel hopeless about the impact one individual can possibly have on such monumental global issues. How can I be of service?”

SUGGESTION: Knowing where to start is often the hardest part of service—the same way you might look at your kitchen sink after preparing a huge feast. Your sink will be overflowing with dirty dishes, pots and pans, fragile glassware and sharp knives, all covered in gook, and the thought of washing them, while you are tired and overfed, is overwhelming. Your initial thought might be to leave them for the morning, and perhaps you secretly hope that one of your guests or your partner will do it for you. However, while the whole mess is indeed completely overwhelming, washing just one single cup, or one plate, is not. If you start by washing just one dirty dish at a time, before you know it, the whole kitchen sink will be clean.

We can look at the world in the same way. For one person to clean up the whole mess of global warming, geopolitical conflict, poverty and hunger is not only impossible, it’s completely overwhelming to even think about. But taking personal responsibility for trying to do one thing better, and inspire others to do something better, is totally doable. In yoga, Sun Salutations—breathing slowly, and connecting each movement with one breath—teach us to embody a step-by-step approach to our lives. Further, if you can choose that one thing that you are going to work on or perfect about your behavior and attitude while here on our small, green and blue planet, you’ll also find that you are re-inspired, and will become filled with energy, inspiration and creativity.

In the Tarot, the Eight of Pentacles might be a good card for you to meditate on. This card shows a young man absorbed in his work; he is an apprentice, meaning that he is learning and perfecting a new skill, and has committed himself to hammering out the details that will lead to mastery. He works on one coin at a time, without stress, only moving on to the next coin when the one he is working on has been completed. The Pentacles are the suit of physical work, and are representative of the Earth energy. This is essentially what your question was regarding. Our planet Earth is a mess, what work can I do to help?

TAROT IMAGE

The first thing is to be grounded, stable, and practical, like the Earth; and then to take it one step at a time. Come up with a simple strategy that you can stick with, like the washing of one dish at a time. This is how a big job gets done. Your commitment to being of service to the world will strengthen and blossom when the job before you feels like it is attainable. The Eight of Pentacles also teaches us that we should not isolate ourselves for too long, for the kind of work you wish to do is not the work of one person.

We need spiritual friends to work with, and communities to develop who share our ideals, values and desire to be of service. Cleaning up the world is not the job of one person, it’s the job everyone! If you take it all on your shoulders, it will just be depressing. So look around, see what is close by that you can take participate in, or what you can create from scratch. After you have taken small steps, you can build bigger teams if you wish to, delegate more, and fulfill your vision of creating a more loving, compassionate world.

Discover more about Eddie Stern and his work here. Do you have a question for “Yogi Says”? Email: [email protected]

TAROTSCOPES: JULY 2016

Posted on by Lindsay Mack

Cast by Lindsay Mack, using The Starchild Tarot.

CANCER – Wheel of Fortune 

 

Happy Birthday, sweet Cancer! What a complex and beautiful energy you’ll be in this month with the Wheel of Fortune—a card that sometimes blesses us with her presence when we have left this moment and drifted off into the future. Honestly ask yourself, Cancer: have you been you checked out of your life in some ways? If so, ask yourself why this might be. Is some aspect of the present feeling uncomfortable, unpleasant, overwhelming, or unfair? Is there a struggle to trust that the future will unfold as it is meant to if you don’t plan every moment?

Be gentle with these inquiries, but be willing to go deep with them. Wherever there is resistance to the present moment is exactly where you must offer your attention and curiosity, especially for this month. The alchemy of the Wheel of Fortune happens when we make the commitment to keep our eyes on our own paper; that’s when we begin co-creating our future with the Universe. The magic happens when we foster this trust in the Divine and loosen the reins on our old methods of control. When there is more space within us, there is more room for the new! This month is about making that room and coming back to ourselves.

Just go slowly and give 100 percent to whatever happens to be in front of you. If you find yourself off in tomorrow or next year, come back home. You’re at choice all month, Cancer. Be willing to make the best of it. Write that letter. Go to the dentist. Wash your dishes. Just be HERE. The rest will come with ease, and it will be glorious.

The day-to-day of the Wheel of Fortune is not always going to feel like much is happening and that’s totally appropriate. The card will always be zeroed in on the minutia of our lives, and whatever is of most importance in this moment. Whatever is here is forming the bridge to the next phase of our lives, even if it doesn’t seem like it. This month gives you the chance to be totally empowered and responsible for the foundation of your future, Cancer, for the unfolding of your dreams. With each moment spent in the present, you create the conditions and the foundation for the future you want. Show up for it.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

LEO – Eight of Cups

 

July is about transformation for you, Leo: empowered, powerful transformation. The month is going to be beautifully cathartic for many of you, and will have a lot to do with moving through transitions that will be life changing. You’ve been working your butt off for the last few months. Many of you have been in rebalancing mode, steadying your nervous systems and brain chemistry after some massive life swings. Now you have your ducks in a row; your feet are on the ground, your emotions are in check, and things will be so much clearer.

This is the perfect planting ground for Eight of Cups magic, as we need a healthy clarity of emotion in order to transform our lives in a powerful and balanced way. A huge aspect of this month for you, Leo, is about being willing to release aspects of your life that are no longer serving you. Being brave I staking out a new path, in a new direction—and not because you’re restless, bored or scared, but because its time. Every single one of you have an aspect of your lives to bless and release this month, effectively transforming that area and opening it up to new opportunities, loves, places and things.

After all, it is only when we make space in our lives that we can be open to receive the new—even if many of the things being let go of this month are things you may have worked hard for. Blood, sweat, and tears hard. Many of you devoted yourselves, sacrificed, tried, went to therapy, put in extra hours; cared for these aspects of your lives and were committed to making them work. Honor this work with all of your soul. Do ceremony and ritual to close the cycle. Speak and write about them; mourn them. In doing so, you’re honoring the preciousness of this life.

That nothing is permanent. That in order to have the beautiful garden we desire, we must weed the garden we currently have. This takes guts, something you have in your DNA, Leo. So rather than bemoaning the loss of something outgrown that you worked so hard to maintain, bless your humanness. Bless your work, your effort and your love. Bless your desire to keep going, too. Bless all life has given you up to now, and then take the next first step forward.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

VIRGO – Page of Cups

 

July has some real sweetness in store for you, Virgo. The invitation of the month is to dive deeply into your magic, to revisit your imagination, and play with abandon. Page of Cups is a gorgeous, whimsical energy, one that holds the dual element of water and earth. The water in Page of Cups can flow to magical realms with ease, because it is grounded and held by the loving embrace of its earthy side.

That is what you are going to be exploring within yourself this month, Virgo: how your earthiness allows you to stay steady and grounded while you fly to other worlds, have amazing experiences, get lost in the joy of the moment, or try something new. You’re going to be learning a whole new side to your Earth element—how it can dance with water, and how it can be a foundation for magic in your life.

Hanging out in this place of grounded dreaminess is the crux of the whole month for you. Because from here a lot of new gifts can flow in, which is really why Page of Cups is the master energy of July. You know how to work, Virgo. Now its time to learn how you can get the same satisfaction and abundance from play and ease. July’s energy feels a lot like a denouement after a climax; there has been so much expansion and shifting in the energy for you guys in the last few months, and now there’s a kind of a cooling off. It is no less exciting and wonderful than any other energy, just a little easier and more mellow. So much more flow will be possible.

You’re learning new ways of being on the planet with Page of Cups, Virgo; accessing the sweetness, magic and joy from the mundane moments of your life. You’ll have access to that energy all month long—if you’re willing to allow it to flow in. If you do, it will change your life, lighting up all of the beautiful possibilities that lay around a corner or just beyond our imagination. This is the perfect month to get into a new healing or magical modality, to play with a new tool or splash in the ocean like a child again. Whatever brings you to those places of preciousness or imagination, dive deeply and explore.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

LIBRA – The Universe

You are entering an evolutionary portal this month, Libra, one that will radically shift your life in a multitude of ways. Get ready for some big and beautiful upgrades in July, ushered in by the beautiful energetic waves of The Universe. It has been such a gift to track the expansion of Libra as a sign these last few months. You guys as a whole have been working SO hard, have been surfing such enormous waves—and if the past has been a challenging pregnancy; July is when you’re finally going to give birth. You’re finally on the edge of the next karmic cycle of your life, and it is going to be glorious.

The Universe, or World card, marks the end of the Major Arcana. It is the completion of an entire cycle of growth, expansion and wisdom. It has been said that the World card is not the end of a chapter, but the closing of a book. We will put this book back on our shelf, and we won’t revisit it in the same way again. For each of you, there is an aspect of your life, whether huge or mundane, that is ending permanently—and all for the better. The World always brings joyful change, change we desperately desire, and the promise of a whole new cycle of continued expansion ahead.

The main thing for you to digest this month, Libra, is that you don’t have to do anything to access this rebirth. You have created and called it to you by virtue of your hard work, and your willingness to move through all of the energetic invitations in front of you. You have said “yes” to every aspect of your evolution, and now there’s a gift at the end of the rainbow—the ability to permanently leave behind an old, outdated aspect of yourself, and blossom into the authenticity of who you really are.

This takes courage, willingness and trust; heart and soul. You’ve got it all, Libra, everything it takes to move into this new time. The intensity of the last few months hasn’t been just a shitty time—its been squeezing out the old beliefs that talked yourself out of your magnificence, out of what you deserved, and into victimhood, blame and excuses. All of that is ending, and a new way is beginning. All you have to do is allow it.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

SCORPIO – Seven of Swords

 

Seven of Wands is a very complex energy, one that is working in subtle ways for you this month, Scorpio. It is about both the upgrading of an old thought pattern, AND the chance to speak and defend your desires in some way that will be truly transformative. Both of these central concepts will be woven together for you in July, providing the framework for a very powerful, internally fruitful month around your career, passions and endeavors.

Sevens in the Tarot have to do with inner work around an external thing; whatever it comes up around totally looks like an outside job. We are often focused on how that aspect of our lives looks, appears or seems—we might be busy with how the lives of others look and seem, too. Whenever we get a Seven, it is a redirection of our energy from external to internal. The Seven of Wands is specifically inner work around outer artistic goals and appearances. So, the first invitation of the month for you, Scorpio, is to inquire as to why external acknowledgement is important to you around that particular area of your life.

If you feel that it will give you something you are seeking, know that there’s no way you can get anything externally without first receiving it from yourself internally. Be willing to seek proof of this; see how much more flows into your life when you approve of yourself without comparison. When we are clear in who we are, we can honor, defend and speak to this. So share who you are, Scorpio: your truth, not your image. Look at all the places in your life you can be more raw and honest. Defend your position without fear that you will lose status or fall. Honor where you are and what you think without censorship.

When we understand that we cannot lose anything we are meant to have, our truth becomes easy to express. The other very subtle energy sweeping through you this month, Scorpio, is that one particular outdated thought pattern is being upgraded for a much truer, braver, more aligned operating system. Release any perception that you have to be anyone other than who you are, allow a new leader in the mind to rise up, guiding you to a renaissance in the way you create and share your art in the world.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

SAGITTARIUS – Akashic Records

 

This is an magical month for you, Sagittarius! A new paradigm within yourself and your life is now available to you, and you will be walking in a sacred energy not seen in any other Tarot deck. * The actual Akashic Records are said to be a sort of cosmic hall of records, in which everything in the Universe that has ever happened or will ever happen is housed. It is also said that we can access this information at any time, if it is in our highest and best interest, in order to receive wisdom and answers about our lives.

The Akashic Records is also a card in Starchild Tarot, and this month it brings brings magnificent tidings for you, Sagittarius—for it is bringing you into full alignment and embodied understanding of how your wishes and desires line up with your soul path. Opposed to the things we might want, desire or wish for in the Earthly realm, our soul path always lines up with our deepest soul desires, and they can align fully if we can honor the balance between what we are here to do and what we desire to cultivate.

You will be working with and living in the energy of the Akashic Records this month, which means that you’ll be experiencing what it is to be in co-creation with the Divine when it comes to your life now. So, on one level, there is a deep honoring of your dharma, your karma, your soul path, and what you’re here to experience, master and move through. What you truly long for—yes, THAT—will be taking root within the garden of the Divine this month. You are truly ready to receive it, and it will come with great wisdom and medicine.

You will also be unlocking an inner knowing that is crucial to receiving what you’ve longed for: an understanding of how what you have been desiring fits into your soul path. If one of us is here to master self-love, it is crucial that we walk solo in the world for a time. If we are here to master brain chemistry, we’re going to move through many mental ups and downs before centering. Expect life to radically shift for you this month, Sagittarius. You are moving into an alignment with the Divine, in total surrender and co-creation; see how what you desire blossoms from that place.

*this card was channeled and added to the Major Arcana by Danielle Noel, creator of the Starchild Tarot

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

CAPRICORN – Ten of Crystals

What a glorious month you have ahead of you, Capricorn. Ten of Crystals, or Pentacles in the traditional tarot, is such a rich energy; a treasure trove of blessings. There is so much abundance, healing and expansion possible within the month for you, if you are willing to allow it in.

So, firstly, congratulate yourself, Capricorn. It has been one hell of a ride for you during the last few months, and you’ve handled it beautifully. There has been so much willingness to move through uncomfortable soul growth; even when you hated it, you still said “yes.” Secondly, this beautiful energy is here this month because of all that hard work—it is showing you the harvest for soul work, rather than human/ego work. This is a crucial distinction, because the latter being replaced by the former is exactly why the last few months have been such a crunch: you’ve been evolving. Evolution is always inherently stressful to the brain and nervous system, but almost always means a wild and beautiful soul expansion.

Ten of Pentacles is the culmination of a cycle of work that yields to a beautiful harvest. The journey to that bountiful place is often difficult and challenging, but ultimately rewarding beyond expression. When we are in this card, we are in an incredibly abundant time, financially, spiritually, emotionally and physically. It is a moment when everything comes to fruit. It is also a card that speaks of healing a family legacy, too. Our choices have stretched back energetically and have taken us way beyond what our parents or their parents did, and rightly so. When we honor our path, despite the conditioning we have received, we can open to all that we desire and all that is here for us. It’s a beautiful energy, and one that you have worked your ass off for, Capricorn.

The key to the presence of the Ten of Pentacles in your month is that we only can receive its richness when we are aligned with our true soul path—not what we think we “should” do, or what others tell us they think we should do. The evolutionary upgrade that Capricorn has been in has been devoted to ending ego and struggle. July will be a perfect chance for you to witness how beautiful life can be when you surrender, allowing life to flow from your aligned path, rather than a place of fear or control.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

AQUARIUS – Five of Crystals 

You are continuing with your mastery around lack, scarcity and fear this month, Aquarius. Five of Crystals, or Pentacles, is traditionally a contraction card. It’s often viewed as a negative, difficult energy, although it has NOT shown up like that for you this month. It is important to know that right off the bat. The Five of Pentacles is only a mindfulness bell, showing you where your beliefs are not in line with your truth. Anytime we have a disruption between our thoughts and our truth, it’s going to create stress of some kind—that’s what this card is waking you up to, Aquarius, so you can smooth it out and expand through it.

Somewhere, for each and every one of you, you’re carrying a belief that is making you feel small, scared and desperate. Maybe even slightly, but it is there. Be really willing to explore this within yourself, because that’s what this card is in service of this month: correcting and rewiring any untrue beliefs. This is so important, because when we feel scarcity, lack or fear, it takes us out of alignment with our flow and truth. It can tend to make us more frantic or desperate, perhaps even in one specific area. Ask yourself: do you trust in the flow of the Universe in all areas but one?

It’s important to ask, because, ironically, the more we feel that begging, scared energy, the tighter we become and so the less we receive. Money, love, help, guidance and community cannot flow through a blocked drain, just as water cannot flow through a hose with a knot in it. So untie the knots and see how much more abundance floods your life. It’s a critical shift for you, Aquarius, and this might be coming up around an area that feels really sensitive right now. Go through it as gently as you can, but do explore it. Nothing will be able to get into your life until you do.

Five of Pentacles is a feeling, not a fact. We are never, ever truly out of alignment with the Universe, but we can squeeze ourselves out of receiving through believing something that makes us experience a tightness of spirit. This also has to do with anywhere that you feel you are undercharging—especially if this comes from anything less than an overflowing personal well. Check your energy levels. Be really clear about where you are, and then honor it.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

PISCES – The Sun 

Understanding, clarity, warmth, truth and rebirth. These are just some of the beautiful qualities of your July, Pisces. Like a warm beam of sunlight on cold skin, this month is going to unravel you in the most delicious way possible. Expect to feel better than you have in a long time; there is nothing but goodness in store for you this month.

The Sun comes after The Moon card in the Tarot, the latter being a very intense card, often having to do with the void, old traumas and life being obscured in some measure of darkness. This is worth mentioning for you, Pisces, because the Moon card in the Tarot is ruled by your sign. You know how to surf and float through huge emotions, depths and times of darkness. You understand, innately, what the flow of the Moon feels like; each day, each moment a little more full or waning. And because you are the master of this, The Sun will feel so much sweeter. As cliched as it sounds, we cannot have the light without the darkness, which is why this month will be so brilliant for you.

The Sun is offering you the chance to fully embrace your innate nature, Pisces. It will provide a framework of appreciation and gratitude for your brilliant ability to coast in times of choppiness and changeability. The Sun’s energy brings us back to a childlike heart, back to the simplicity and to the empowerment that comes with self-acceptance and self-love. It also provides literal clarity, both in the form of light and answers. Light pours on every crack and cranny of our lives when we are in The Sun, helping us see things as they truly are. This card can bring deep joy, but more importantly it brings illumination. It brings answers to long held questions. It brings acceptance and forgiveness. It helps us to embrace all that we are, all that we’ve become. It’s a beautiful energy, and will radiate from your being this month, Pisces.

The last wisdom to offer about this card is that you can trust it. It is safe to come into the sunshine and the warmth. Explore any fear around that; the only fear there is of your own brilliance, anyway. So shine your light, let it beam out of you—know that you have been the light in the dark this whole time.

This is a good month for Pisces, especially those of you who are healers, artists or helping profe King of Cups wears a mask to do his healing work in the world. Not a bad mask, but one that allows him to hold both a private experience and a public face; and he can do this because he is a gentle leader, one who is coded for service.

Basically what this invitation means for you, Pisces, is that it’s time to get back into the flow of life. To show up. To speak your truth, share your wisdom, and to not hold back. The world really needs you. It needs you in your joy, in your light, healthy and happy. You have overflow, so use it. A gentle invitation to those of you who, at this moment, might feel miles away from this place of energetic abundance, this place of balance and generosity: remember you can always choose the willingness to stay open to the possibility of a different way of seeing, doing, and being.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

ARIES – Ace of Pentacles 

The name of the game for you in July is all about receiving, Aries. Are the doors and windows of your life open to gifts and grace? How much goodness and ease is able to flow in to you? This inquiry will be a very important one for you this month, and there will be consistent invitations to widen your channel of receiving; these invitations will come in many forms, so keep your heart open for them.

There are a gorgeous and magical worlds contained within the Ace of Pentacles, which is a seed of possibility and fruitful abundance. All Aces are spiritual teachers, containing gifts straight from the Divine. The Aces don’t always offer specific physical items—instead, they ask us to be available to receive the energy of whatever they carry, regardless of the form it comes in. The Ace of Pentacles lives in the realm of money, abundance, gifts, newborn babies, homes, and the body. Pentacles are about living spiritually on the material plane, so the Aces represent all that can be attained within this balance. It’s a beautiful, welcome medicine, and is here with some deep gifts.

For you, Aries, the time has come to truly embody that you will receive more from being open and rested than being exhausted and burned out. This month will flex your trust and ease muscles in a big way; let’s take actual money, for example. The more you understand that you only ever receive abundance directly from the Universe’s bank account, the more any monetary stress, strain, pressure and planning can be dismissed and upgraded. This Ace is both a gift and a healthy challenge in this realm; how easy are you willing to let it be?

The Ace of Pentacles is, above all, a seed. This is important to embody, because seeds don’t look like forests. They don’t look like the flowers and trees that they become. Be open and available to any gift this month, Aries, no matter what it looks like. The key is receptivity, openness and ease. You will be asked again and again this month to let it be easier; to upgrade your willingness to receive rather than cultivate. Feeling this connection to the abundant flow is our birthright. Once you can consider that there is a lush garden of Divine abundance around you, the harvest becomes a joy.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

TAURUS – Ace of Cups

Let the love flow in this month, Taurus, both from yourself and the external world. Let everyone and everything beautiful around you be your mirror, so you can begin see your own beauty, specialness, uniqueness and wonder through the eyes of those who love you. Even a beautiful sunset or a flower; as I said before, in this card, the world is your mirror.

The Ace of Cups is about love; falling in love, allowing yourself pleasure, being cleansed and washed anew. This may or may not be a month to receive new love from another, but it is certainly a month to receive love from yourself. This is the soul of the Ace of Cups, and the deepest teaching of the Cups as a suit, I think: that love is an inside job first. We must be willing to receive it from ourselves before we are able to receive it from another. And as in partnership, it’s not what you say, but what you do that counts.

July gives you the opportunity to clean up your inner dialogue, Taurus, to upgrade it to reflect new language and new forms of self care and kindness. Be kind to yourself, dear one. Honor and bless yourself, wholly and completely. Let this whole month be a ritual in self-celebration. If it makes you uncomfortable, it is exactly what you need. The Ace of Cups is not only upgrading the ways in which you love and regard yourself, it is also upgrading the love and relationships you have around you. If you desire a partner or community, the work and rewiring you do on yourself will open the door to brand new interactions and connections on that front. It will open your heart and open your channel.

Any and all relationships in our lives are mirrors; what are yours reflecting to you, Taurus? The love is there—you just might need to polish your mirror a bit so you can see clearly. If you allow pleasure into your inner life, you will multiply it 1000-fold externally. If you love yourself and regard yourself with worth, there will be more outer reflections of it. The more we love ourselves, the clearer the mirror becomes. Go slowly, go curiously, go gently. Consider it might be the most natural thing in the world for you to fall in love with yourself. The cup is right there; drink deeply, Taurus.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

GEMINI – Ten of Wands

Have you heard the term, “fool’s errand,” sweet Gemini? The Webster’s dictionary defines it as: “a task or activity that has no hope of success.” So often we can wind up in one of those, no? So wrapped up in our thoughts, beliefs and stories that we don’t take time to consider: is what I am doing sustainable? Is it manageable? Do I need to ask for help? In this case, Gemini, it goes no, no…and YES. It is not your hopes, dreams and dearest desires that are the fool’s errands—it is how you are attempting to fulfill them that needs an upgrade.

Not the what, only the how is unsustainable. And that’s what this month is dedicated to correcting. As such, you must ask for help, Gemini. You must. ask. for. help. You’re at a critical point right now, one where there is an opportunity for massive personal and external transformation. If you’re lost or struggling, ask for advice and then take the advice. If you’re burned out and exhausted, burning the candle at both ends, drop the story that fried equals productive. There is a happy middle ground that you have yet to master, Gemini. You can come up for air. You can take breaks. You can let people in; you can be vulnerable. You can ask for help.

How? Be willing to see the support that surrounds you. Be willing to see how much easier it can be if you can offer yourself a moment here or there. There is another facet of Gemini that this card is speaking to very specifically: yes, the totally hidden inner life you keep so secret. I’m talking to those of you who’s co-workers, friends and even loved ones would never know how full your plate actually is (Gemini men, I hope you’re hearing me).

This month, crack the door of your heart open to someone that can support the whole you. If this isn’t a partner or colleague, journal about it or see a therapist. It can be equal parts relief and painful to have such a good poker face that no one knows what’s really going on underneath. But it’s time to be brave and really let someone in. Because it can be easier, Gemini. It can be so, so, SO much easier. You have the chance to upgrade your operating system this month, in ways subtle and overt. Take a break, rebalance, ask for assistance. You deserve it.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

SENSITIVE SOUL: WORK WITH A CANCER MOON SIGN

Posted on by Ash Bonelli

Tips and practices to help understand and work with your Cancer Moon sign from Ash Bonelli. Artwork: Prince Lauder via Behance.net

4e119020163999.562e6999831de

The Moon represents the inner subconscious world that we usually only share with those we love and trust. It can show us our needs and how we care for others—and as such, our Moon sign (where the Moon falls in our birth chart) shows the style in which we express this softer side.

Work out your Moon sign, when you do you chart for free here.

The inner world of the Cancer Moon sign is a gentle, vulnerable and emotional landscape. The Moon rules the sign of Cancer so she feels quite at home in this sign making it easy to fully express her archetypal nature. When we think of the crab itself (the symbol for Cancer), we see the hard protective shell on the outside but know there is nothing but softness on the inside. A small being that carries its sanctuary on its back so it can feel at home wherever it goes.

These themes symbolize the Cancer Moon sign. You can put on a brave face, but deep down you feel EVERYTHING. You usually cry easily and really experience the emotions of any particular situation or environment you happen to be in. This Moon is very in tune with its intuition, thoughts and feelings—so much so you sometimes forget that not everything is always about you. Being sensitive is great, until it isn’t and you become resentful and hide away in your shell. There is a fine balance to be found with the Cancer Moon sign.

Taking care of others usually makes you quite happy, but when it goes unappreciated or the care isn’t returned you can get quite hurt. And so Cancer Moons are often working on expressing their needs. Working on being vocal about this is really important, as you can get so lost in taking care of others that you end up with the short end of the stick.

Fear of getting hurt is very real for you for you, mainly since being hurt in love, for example, you may feel it more deeply than others. Honestly, unless you live under a rock, you will be familiar with this pain and what it can do to you. So this is a genuine fear, but not one that should stop you from receiving love.

Often times the Cancer Moon sign is associated with the mother, and rightfully so—since both Cancer and the Moon represent this energy. But not every Cancer Moon sign wants to be a parent. The mother archetype is actually about nurturing and caring for others, offering tender love and support, and this can be applied to anything in life. Your career, your pets, your friends, your home or your hobbies. You can channel this inner need to love into anything and it will be fulfilling, just as long as you let others love you back so there is a sense of balance in your life.

Below are some suggestion to connect more to your sweet Cancer Moon sign, and make the most of its intuitive expression…

:: ACTIVE LISTENING ::
The Cancer Moon sign has a tendency to feel first when engaging with others. This can go badly if you what you intuitively pick up about someone is incorrect, which can shape the relationship in the wrong direction. You can get your feelings hurt because you feel you know what they “really meant.” But assumption is really dangerous, since it can lead to un-founded resentment which can turn into distance.

This can be easily avoided if you work on listening to what they are actually saying, rather than simply feeling into their energy. If assumption-based feelings occur take the time to ask questions to gain further insight. Use your nurturing nature to engage in a more open conversation. This way you aren’t incorrectly just reading (or rather feeling) between the lines.

:: SANCTUARY ::
All Cancer Moon signs need a place to retreat. They need a space to feel safe and secure where they can let all of their emotions out without judgement. This doesn’t need to be an entire home or apartment either. It could be one room, or even a space within a room. Maybe a meditation pillow with a small altar if this practice speaks to you.

It could also be a certain location, such as your favorite park or beach. For some it could be a place from your childhood. The Cancer Moon sign can be very nostalgic so places that awaken happy memories really warm your heart.

:: NURTURE ::
Find something to nurture in your life that isn’t another person. The need to express care is innate, but you can get burned out if this means attracting energy vampires. Needy people love the sweet lunar crab, for you will always try to help solve the problems they should be dealing with on their own. And so learn to be selective.

Finding a hobby that will reward your nurturing with feelings of worth and accomplishment is such a good idea. Think gardening, or cooking, working with animals, or becoming a beekeeper. What do you want to be good at that requires time, nurturance and patience? Find something that makes your heart feel good and you will bring some emotional balance back into your life.

:: INTUITIVE PROTECTION ::
Being that you are such an intuitive, maybe even psychically gifted person, you need to work on protecting your energy. Otherwise it’s likely people will energetically take from you until you are totally drained. This can make you feel vulnerable in an unhealthy way.

Begin by taking time each morning to visualize yourself being cleansed by white healing light. Just a simple shower before (or even during!) your regular shower. Then imagine a bubble of light surrounding you, which people can only enter into when invited by you. It can be any color that you love.

These are your mental and energetic guards for the day ahead. You could also burn some sage in your space before your start your day or make a healing spray with essential oils to mist yourself with. Anything that  creates an energetic boundary between you and the world will help.

Also, be present to when you feel depleted. What was going on? Who were you around? Sometimes the best defense is creating literal space between you and the people or situations that take advantage of you.

Above all, may you find comfort in your innate ability to be vulnerable—and use it to show others the strength in letting down our guard in a world that needs it more than ever before.

CURIOUS COMMUNICATOR: WORK WITH A GEMINI MOON SIGN

Posted on by Ash Bonelli

Tips and practices to help understand and work with your Gemini Moon sign from Ash Bonelli. Artwork: Prince Lauder via Behance.net

7f380720163999.562e699996de1

The Moon represents what we need in life to feel safe, secure, and how we need to be nurtured, and understanding your Moon’s requirements can help you connect deeper to your more private self. When you have a bad day or are just feeling “off” you want to tap into your Moon. She is the cosmic mother and learning more about the sign where she sits in your birth chart, can reveal so much about your internal landscape.

Work out your Moon sign, when you do you chart for free here.

The Gemini Moon sign is forever curious. She wants to learn about anything and everything. This Moon loves to engage and communicate, since Gemini is a mutable air sign that needs mental stimulation and variety. When things become stagnant the restless demons set in—and so keeping things moving in life is key.

Depending on the rest of your chart, these behaviors/tendencies may express in a need to always have light and breezy conversations. You enjoy gathering data, processing it and then moving on to the next interesting person, subject or experience. This flitting about keeps things upbeat and interesting yet can have a downside.

The Gemini Moon sign is learning to also go deep. It’s about finding some balance between superficial experiences and really getting to know yourself and others on a more intimate level. Because of this Moon’s voracious appetite for new information, you can come across fickle or insincere if this expression is out of balance.

This analytical moon usually symbolizes a gifted speaker, writer or teacher. Since you are always gathering information you put it to good use by sharing it with others, and this exchange of thoughts, ideas and insights can be quite soothing for you. The give and take is the thrill that propels you forward to find more.

This is a delightful quality that makes you fun to chat with, as well as being able to turn a negative emotional situation into a happier one. The Gemini Moon sign is clever and witty, so having an innate emotional tie to these abilities can bring true fulfillment through expression.

Just make sure to keep the input and output in check or you will never be able to get to your deeper self. There can be an avoidance of darker undercurrents if you don’t allow yourself time to really feel your feelings, which may mean missing out on the beauty of vulnerability.

Below are some suggestions to bring some balance back to your energetic moon as well as ways to emphasize it. These are meant to empower and bolster your emotional wellbeing to be at your best!

:: FOCUS ::
Zero in on a project that you have to stay committed to—anything that will require you to stick to it long enough to actually become proficient at it. Since Gemini is placed in the linguistic camp you could learn a new language. Mercury being Gemini’s ruler is associated with dexterity so you could learn to play an instrument. The other benefit of this for you emotionally, is that once you’ve mastered this new interest you then get to share it, creates a beautiful cyclical effect for your heart, and your Gemini Moon sign.

:: BREATHWORK ::
Learning to control your responses in more hectic situations could be very healing—and one way is with the simple art of breathing. Try practicing the 2:1 ratio breath, in which increasing the length of your exhalation helps to relax your parasympathetic nervous system. Start by breathing through the nose in your natural way without counting. Then after a few rounds begin to breath in for a count of two, and exhaling for four. Work your way up to deeper breaths from there, and try doing 10 rounds the next time you begin feeling the frazzled.

:: MINDFULNESS ::
In the simplest terms, this simply means being aware and in the present moment without judgement—actually quite hard, since the Gemini Moon sign is often stuck between wondering what the future holds and dwelling on the past. Finding a meditation practice that works for you is key, and if sitting still is just too much for you try doing a walking meditation, which will burn up any restlessness through mindful movement. You could also try Qi Gong—which covers practices from the gentle Tai Chi to the more fierce option, Kung Fu. Potentially a healing double whammy, helping you to focus and be more in the moment while still satisfying the need to learn and grow.

TAROTSCOPES: JUNE 2016

Posted on by Lindsay Mack

Cast by Lindsay Mack, using The Starchild Tarot.

GEMINI – Justice, reversed 

Happy birthday, dear Gemini! You will be moving through quite the internal journey in Justice reversed, which is bringing some huge invitations this month. Should you choose to navigate this energy gracefully, it will yield to some truly life changing expansions for you. Justice reversed is asking you to accept your life’s present situations and circumstances exactly as they are—no story, no thinking, no blaming, no judgment. Almost every major aspect of your life will be projected to you through this lens and invitation, Gemini, and there’s a two-fold reason as to why:

The first is that our lives are a lot more peaceful and productive when we’re not fighting or arguing with reality. If something is happening, it is what is supposed to happen. Not because of some pseudo-spiritual idealogy, but because it occurred. It is reality. We cannot argue with reality and still live in peaceful alignment with truth. So you can find a new kind of balance in accepting the present moment, Gemini. This doesn’t mean you have to like it! Simply that you’re no longer fighting what is. Once you drop the fight, there will be so much more energy and clarity available to you.

The second reason is that only when we accept ourselves and our current situation as it is that we are free to change it. This acceptance yields to a grounded empowerment, and a sense of true personal responsibility. This is truly the liberation that Justice reversed offers you this month, Gemini. Drop any beliefs around things being “unfair,” or “not supposed to be this way,” along with any passive aggressive behavior that stems from this place. Drop the stories and so much growth is available.

How might your life be different if you weren’t lost in your stories? How much more energy would you have? What kind of empowered action might you take in your relationship, job, or with your health and family? How much more compassion would you have? How much of your anxiety and discomfort with your present life circumstances are connected to your stories about how things “should” be different than they currently are? Inquire and set yourself free.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

CANCER – King of Wands

TOTAL energetic shift for you this month, Cancer! Wow! King of Wands is fire, stability, power and action—so sink your teeth into these qualities and truly soak up all the energy extending its magic to every aspect of your life. It’s going to be a phenomenal month for you if you can consciously harness the power.

Cancers have been bobbing up and down in the waves for the last few cycles—one moment full of directed action and hopeful purpose, the next spent within your shell, retreating and recovering from all of the movement. The great news is that these waves have been preparing you to spend much more time out of your shell, sharing your gifts and abilities with the world. The waves have been slowly building up some energetic muscles for you, helping you to feel safer fully out in the world.

The King of Wands is the perfect ally for you this month, Cancer. This energy is STRONG. It is stable, clear-headed (even during times of extreme pressure), and confident without being cocky. You will be taking on and embodying this energy in June, and it has the potential to be fantastic for your career, creative pursuits, and love life. The fact is, sweet Cancer, you are amazing at what you do. You are worthy, lovable, sexy, smart, and hold so much power and ability to make a huge impact. Be willing to be seen in this light this month—even if it makes you extremely uncomfortable. Frankly, if it does, it means you’re on the right track! If we’re not uncomfortable, we are usually not growing. Take comfort in that.

Last month’s invitation to weed out all possible areas of energetic drain has made this kind of expansion and “take off” possible for you, Cancer. Allow yourself to be uncomfortable, and step forward into greatness. Begin to implement different self-care techniques to reground and re-center, then step forward again. Be willing to be seen, be willing to speak your truth, and tell the world about your work. Whatever you are making, whatever you are passionate about, share it and open your heart. You have much to offer people, Cancer, but your tribe has to be able to find you. Let the King of Wands light the way.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

LEO – King of Crystals, reversed 

Continue to be very gentle with yourself this month, Leo. This was your invitation in May as well, and you’re still very much in that energy. June is all about self-care for you. It is a time to completely unplug, recharge, go within and get back to basics: breathing, good food, hydration, reading, outdoor time and meditation. It is crucial that you re-center and get back to the core sense of who you are and what you’re here to do. There has been so much burnout, work and distraction for Leo lately; your nervous systems is really fried, even if you might not feel or want to admit this. June is going to help to cool you off considerably, preparing you for a healthy and overflowing expansion in the fall.

King of Crystals (Pentacles in the traditional tarot) right way up is a leader who knows who he is, what he is here for and where he is going. His tremendous passion is grounded and earthy, fire he knows how to use wisely. The reversal of the card for Leo this month, is a gentle indication that you need to realign yourself with these important King of Pentacles aspects: living in your leadership, knowing who you are, tempering that inner fire, cultivating a sense of connection to Earth, and to regeneration. You must go within to reclaim a place of healthy passion, drive and self awareness.

The medicine for you this month is to remember that this time is both temporary and helpful—shining a light on an old pattern so that you don’t have to deal with it anymore. To get your compass facing true north again, you must surrender to this time. Allow gentle self care to be your guiding star, leading you to greatness.

You ARE being led forward into a new and spectacular time, Leo, whether you feel it or not. The path might feel relatively unclear for you at this moment, but this is absolutely appropriate. If you saw all of the goodness on its way to you, it would be a total distraction from the gentle self care that is imperative at this time. Trust and allow. Trust that you are not lost, merely evolving and upgrading to a more grounded and healthy sense of who you are and how you can use your energy and power in the most optimal way. Commit to it and be transformed.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

VIRGO – Nine of Wands 

It is of the utmost importance for Virgos to move at their own pace this month. Nice and easy is the name of the game. Nine of Wands is an enormous energy, one that teaches us to honor rest during a long and wildly intense time, energetically. Whether you are on a journey, in the midst of a deadline, or just moving through some huge internal expansions, it will be imperative to take breaks within the frenzy—and to resist the temptation to apologize or explain yourself for doing so.

Only we can know our inner experience, and it is up to us to honor ourselves by going slowly or resting as we need at any given moment. When we do so, instead of muscling through life, we not only live in alignment with what is in our highest and best on a personal level, but we invite others to do the same thing. This is how we can sustain high frequency energy without burnout, by taking little stops along the way. It is Shakti energy, letting all the power and intensity move through us without getting totally overwhelmed by it.

Virgos bring such an important and unique frequency to the planet. You guys are processing so much energy much of the time, and as a result, your nervous systems are arguably the most sensitive of all the signs. This month will be the chance to truly learn how to move and process high frequency energies while staying grounded and balanced. We get Nine of Wands when we are ALMOST to a finish line. That’s the feel of it. Virgos have been on such a ride these past few months, and there is most definitely a break coming for you energetically in late summer/early fall. Possibly even in mid-June/early July.

There is something very important about this time for Virgos, although it might not seem that way on the surface. It’s the final burst of adrenaline before the finish line, when you can finally recover and nourish yourselves. This card truly helps us know the stuff we are made of. If you can move through Nine of Wands energy, you can do anything. Expect a lot of intensity, pressure and heat this month in your life, Virgo. It’s going to be hard work, but amazing. Embrace the opportunity to master how to balance this energy with gentle breaks and self care.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

LIBRA – Perspective, reversed 

You’ve been given lots and lots of gentle taps on the shoulder, Libra. Little whispers to slow down, quiet the mind, and be still. This month, you almost have no choice but to fall into an Ego death; it’s a whole new level for you in terms of self-actualization.

Perspective is The Hanged Man in the traditional tarot, and this card is the perfect ally for you right now, Libra; a voluntary surrender from the Ego and into the heart and soul. When reversed, however, the main and primary focus is on clearing up any resistance to this surrender before we can flip into the heart. Perspective reversed is an energy that will not leave until the job is done, so you might as well welcome it in with open arms. This month is a bit like entering a new portal for you, Libra. Once you get a taste of this kind of freedom, there really is no going back.

You’ve been working hard, moving through a really intense time, but not fully surrendered yet. One foot is still out the door, specifically around not believing your thoughts. This is what Libra is here to master and experience, so this is in NO WAY a problem. It is exactly what it should be. So honor this, first and foremost. Secondly, this is not a shattering of YOU—just of the ego. Any part of you that resists, or gets defensive and withdrawn is the ego; it freaks because it knows its losing its ranking. Be willing to be courageous, to question your thoughts. Firmly and lovingly move that part of you from the driver’s seat into the back seat, then let it tantrum.

Tantrum is a great word for Perspective reversed. There is profound resistance to hanging out in the Void of pure love, so the ego kicks up a tantrum to distract us—because it’s afraid. Important to remember, so you’re not treating it like an enemy. Let it scream, as you just keep coming back to your breath, to the present moment. This is actually how Hanged Man is working for you this month, by untying the little knots in any given moment you find your ego freaking out in. Stay with it, Libra. Move through this ego death, and prepare for a new way of walking through the world. And unimaginably beautiful things will come out of this time for you.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

SCORPIO – Knight of Wands

Getting back in touch with a playful, joyful sexuality is of the utmost importance for you in June, Scorpio. Where is the part of you that loves to be seen and heard? Loves to dance and rejoice? Loves to let other people feel your power, light and magnetism? You all touched this place within yourselves as children; now it is time to come back home to it.

You’re in a very different energy this month, one that really has the power to fuel you. But it’s not a “getting shit done” kind of month. The Knight of Wands is fire and air; passion, creativity and movement, with our fully-engaged minds along for the ride. This is a conscious commitment to being in your playful, creative flow. Some of you are still healing deep wounds, some of you are quietly processing some major karmic shit—but the invitation to play is open, even for the most fragile of you.

This can be embraced in any number of ways. Take voice lessons, perform in a play, let people hear your music, take salsa dancing class, get a new outfit that makes you feel like a million dollars, walk around topless, listen to music that makes you feel powerful—whatever makes your spirit soar, lean into it. For some of you, this may be a more internal, quiet energy. For others, it’ll be very public and broad. Let yourself be as big as you desire to be, and drop any story about not being ready: you’re as ready as you’ll ever be. Take the plunge.

The “why” of this invitation is really the most powerful part: and the answer is, because you deserve to feel joy and the spark of excitement again, Scorpio. It has been a VERY intense few months for many of you; now it is time to reconnect with how profoundly you deserve to feel good. This is also aligning some of you with how life can be easier, more graceful. So look around you: where is there room for more joy, passion and creativity in your life? Are you too exhausted, busy, broke or distracted to allow this energy to flow through you? It might be tough, it might bring up feelings of defensiveness, but I encourage you to really ask yourself these questions. Absorb your answers with an open heart, and make adjustments from there.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

SAGITTARIUS – King of Swords

Let this entire month be a process of connecting your heart to your throat, Sagittarius. Speak your truth. Your truest truth. Speak about your pain, your defensiveness, your fear—let it be vulnerable, let it be soft, let it be a healing. It is also time to communicate your perceived weaknesses, Sag. No more editing yourself. You don’t have to have it figured out, and it doesn’t have to be perfect. Just share yourself, wherever you happen to be.

There has been a very interesting pattern arising with Sagittarians. A lot of cracking open, replacing hard walls with softness. Whether you knew it or not, the last few months have been leading you to this moment, embracing and honoring the shadow in a whole new way. Not doctoring or tweaking it to make it more palatable. More sharing what you feel through a raw, imperfect and glorious lens. The King of Swords is a communicator. A powerful presence who allows his passion and his heart to be connected to his mind and words. This is an invitation to speak, share and express yourself profoundly. The phrase, “the truth will set you free” comes to mind.

Now, let us clarify something here: Sagittarians will speak their mind on anything. This is one of the greatest qualities about your sign. If you’re feeling or thinking something, trust that it’s going to be shared. However, there is a portion of your truth that does not get shared. For some of you, a little side dish—for others, a full meal. It’s usually around an area where you’re highly vulnerable, or have your guard and defenses up very high. And there’s rawness of expression that you’re being asked to hang out in this month. The why of it, however, is pretty amazing.

You’re leveling up, Sag. You want bigger, brighter, sweeter and more potent lives? Share that raw truth, and it’ll drop right in. You guys bring forward courageous, empowered, passionate expression, blazing the torch for other people to share their truest truth. You cannot do this unless you are willing to share yours—even if you qualify this as “difficult” for you. Let your heart continue to crack open. Get raw, soft, and vulnerable, and you will find levels of expansion you didn’t even know were possible.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

CAPRICORN – Nine of Crystals, reversed

There is so much goodness, joy and abundance in your life right now, Capricorn. So resist getting lost in your story about how you don’t have this or that and just be here now. Taste the blessings around you. Look at the fruits of all you’ve worked for. Can you show yourself gratitude for that without adding a “but” or a “should” to your language? This will be your invitation this month—to come back to this moment, and all the goodness around you. To appreciate yourself and all that you’ve gained with your efforts in life thus far. To drop the story about how it’s not what you really want or what you think you should have, be or think. None of that is reality.

Reality is what’s right in front of you, and I can tell you it’s exactly what you need because it’s what you’ve got! You cannot move forward and receive more unless you’re willing to start here, so you might as well do it now. For some of you, any quasi disappointment with what’s “here now” might be around love and relationships. You cannot improve the relationship you’re in unless you yourself are expanding (with or without your partner), so refocus on that and drop the story. Same goes for those of you who are single. Are you embracing this solitary time? It won’t be forever, so appreciate the space, the richness of possibility. Don’t wait for anyone—just live.

For those of you who are feeling “less than” about work, are you full of complaints and stories about how you want to quit, move on, learn this new thing, yet nothing happens? Just drop the story and do the thing. Commit and see what flows from there. Instead of loathing your current situation, bless it and send a prayer up to the Universe that you desire better. This way you keep living in the frequency of “better.” Take empowered action and choose what brings you joy; see what’s right in front of you. If this is arising about money, I guarantee you that you need to offer yourself more alone time—to go inward and be grateful for what’s here.

Capricorn, this is usually not my style. I don’t believe in making up dishonest gratitude when we just aren’t feeling it. But with you this is different. You really DO have all this beauty around you that you’re not seeing. You must pause in order to pick the fruit and appreciate what you’ve created thus far. Nurture the belief that you are enough and you have all you need. Watch and see how much more dances its way to your door.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

AQUARIUS – Six of Swords, reversed 

It might be harder to see the forest for the trees this month, Aquarius. Our inner experiences and external situations may act as thick foliage, obscuring the bigger picture. For most of you, the Six of Swords is a tiny whisper—a call to inquire and get clear before you jump to action or assume anything. For a few of you, it may be more like a knock on the head. Either way, it’s a specific invitation to pause and get clear before you take action. How you do so will determine a great deal of the month for you. It’ll also bring you into a space of rationale and personal responsibility around all things. So, how do you act from a place of center, when things around you are unclear?

One ways to get clear is to go slower in all ways. Think before you act, assume less, pause more. This is going to show up in different ways for all of you this month; for some of you it will be in relationships or matters of the heart. For others, it’ll be around family and work. Just go gently through whatever arises, meeting it with as much curiosity and compassion as possible.

The other invitation for you this month, Aquarius, is to ask for help if you need it. Support is a huge piece, because you need to feel that it’s available to you anytime you need it. Reaching out for any kind of support shuts down the voice in the brain (the voice of the ego) that tells us we have to woman-up and go it alone. It’s also important to welcome the assistance of friends, neighbors and our soul tribe, since the people in our life serve as mirrors for us. They show us where we are pointed when the compass is whizzing around and confusing us.

So as you reach out to others, choose wisely—seeking the council and support of those you sense will help you evolve through this place of potential lack of clarity by utilizing the clearest mirrors in your life to reflect back love and guidance to you. On the other hand, the backdrop to this tricky-sounding footwork is a month that will also be full of light, love, goodness and fun for you, Aquarius. Think of this energy as just a highly specific and very important dance that you’re learning right now. Lean into it and feel the support in your life leading you back home.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

PISCES – King of Cups 

This is a good month for Pisces, especially those of you who are healers, artists or helping professionals in some way. King of Cups holds immense space for the emotions of others, and can do so without becoming overwhelmed or drained. He can do this because he is balanced, which is the key word for Pisces this month. You’ve been working through some swings; some moments it’s all about you with no room for anyone else, other times it’s all about other people.

This month, there’s a quantum shift. You have the capacity to hold space for your own emotions while remaining balanced and available to others. It’s going to have a beautiful effect on your self esteem, relationships, and careers. The King of Cups walks the line of fire and water; blending passion, a nurturing heart, and an ability to flow with whatever is in front of him. Basically Pisces, you now have enough space within YOU to truly hold space for others. Utilize this, and trust in your ability to do this. Even if you’re not a helping professional, the spirit remains the same. This month will show you that you can take on much more than you thought you could—and thrive.

It’s been a powerful time for Pisces, a lot of reordering and rebuilding, helping your sensitive souls get used to the frenetic energy of the times. Your nervous systems are getting more and more used to it, and I think you’ll feel a huge difference this month. In the Motherpeace tarot, the King of Cups wears a mask to do his healing work in the world. Not a bad mask, but one that allows him to hold both a private experience and a public face; and he can do this because he is a gentle leader, one who is coded for service.

Basically what this invitation means for you, Pisces, is that it’s time to get back into the flow of life. To show up. To speak your truth, share your wisdom, and to not hold back. The world really needs you. It needs you in your joy, in your light, healthy and happy. You have overflow, so use it. A gentle invitation to those of you who, at this moment, might feel miles away from this place of energetic abundance, this place of balance and generosity: remember you can always choose the willingness to stay open to the possibility of a different way of seeing, doing, and being.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

ARIES – Ten of Wands 

Aries, the Divine is cracking the whip. The way you are working and moving through the world is no longer serving you—at all. There is a level of continual adrenal exhaustion that is really not sustainable. No more, and thank God for it. There must be a new way, and everything is here to support you in creating it. June will be inviting you into a space where you will have to make adjustments to the way you work, take on tasks, and replenish your personal well.

There must be a new commitment to balance, or you can no longer continue to go forward at all. So where do you start? You begin by employing some gentleness, and calming down the Ram, so to speak. You start with baby steps: whatever your dream self care routine is, begin. Even if it’s five minutes a day, start with five minutes.

The second thing, which is crucial, is that you must ask for help—you must, Aries. You must! Know that you can trust other people and that it is safe for you to receive. An important message for your ego too, which in moments like this can be fragile. It can be intensely vulnerable for you to ask for help, Aries. But this is important for you. There really is no other way.

Also: this isn’t about lightening up your schedule or streamlining your life, necessarily. If you’re busy or working or in a situation that moves you, that’s all well and good—this isn’t about saying “no” to more. But you do have to take a knee, be fearless, and welcome in more support to help you maintain this level of work. How you are functioning isn’t sustainable, so June will be directing you in a new way. When we find ourselves in a place like this, we don’t drop the thing we are engaged in or working on. We try a new way with it, and see how we can reorder it.

However—if you DO feel the need to take more time for yourself, or sense that you want to lighten up in one area or another, you won’t know what must go until you’ve rested and regenerated a bit. And so go gently and mindfully through the month. But above all, know that don’t have to do it on your own, Aries. More so, that it’s not serving you to do it on your own. So open the windows and doors and let the support flood in.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

TAURUS – Three of Swords, reversed

June is a month for taking out the trash, Taurus. As in, outdated forms of self-medication, drama, gossip and people in your life who drain you energetically. Everything that keeps you in a place of swirling negativity, anxiety and low frequency is gone—swept away in the energy of the Three of Swords reversed. The potential for personal transformation from this energetic clear out is massive. June is clearing out the last little splinters that have been pulling you back into contraction. What is being birthed in its place is true peace and separation from any energy that does not serve you, allowing you to heal any old wounds.

Three of Swords is an experience of heartbreak, heartache, drama, betrayal, anxiety and/hurt feelings. I have always thought of the Buddhist teaching of The Second Arrow with this card; we can’t always control the first sword to the heart. Someone is rude to us on the subway; a parent or partner says something insensitive or out of anger. Any of these are the “first arrow,” and we had no control over the wound they caused. It pierced us without any warning.

The “second arrow,” however, is optional, and created by our reaction to the first arrow. These are the wounds we cause by making war with the offending person, place or situation, or dropping into anger and victimhood. Sword upon sword upon sword. The Three of Swords asks that we remove the knives completely, drop the drama, and tend to the heart, the deep wounds and to our vulnerability, rather than the story of the wounds. This is what it is asking of you, too, Taurus.

Because the card is reversed for you, it speaks of good tidings. You’re no longer engaged in the same reactionary cycle as you once were, which is something to celebrate. The Three of Swords reversed, is bringing a much lighter energy for you than if it was right side up. It is here this month to completely break any cycle of mental identification with victimhood, and to soften you into your heart even more deeply than you imagined. In doing so, you will change your relationship with how you treat your precious body, mind and spirit, no longer dragging yourself through mud or drama. Move through the energy, complete the cycle, and soothe the heart.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

A SENSORY EXPLORATION OF GEMINI SEASON

Posted on by Bess Matassa

Enter Gemini season—with a tribute to the one and only Prince, in this month’s exploration of the current cosmic energies by Cara George & Bess Matassa of Mojave Rising

Prince gemini season the numinous

Gemini season beckons us to strap on our butterfly wings and sample the infinite possible pathways through the kaleidoscope of our lives. The zodiac’s iridescent muse reminds us that we can choose “both, and,” rather than “either, or,” and that it’s all just happening without us always having to understand.

It’s a month for simply letting the Universe happen through us, without judgment and sometimes without any filtration at all. So click your ruby-slippered heels together three times, and turn your story inside out. Bend it. Stretch it. Paint it twenty-five shades of rainbow-kissed wilderness. And remember that certainty is brittle. Indeed, that certainty begs to be broken.

The keyword: “Threshold.”  

The song lyrics: “I’m not a woman/I’m not a man/I am something that you’ll never understand” – Prince, I Would Die 4 U

Check out our playlist, complete with street sounds, exploratory electronica, and rogue tunes from across the pond. And while our musical Gemini patron saint isn’t on Spotify, we’ve included special Prince picks in our sign-by-sign selection (further below).

The colors: Somewhere over the rainbow and way beyond Kansas with iridescence, shimmer, and glitter, cracking us open to prismatic perspectives.  

Cover2

The look: Ethereal glitter rock, expansive androgyny, and high/low cultural collisions. Feathers, gossamer, fabrics that move, and star-studded stilettos paired with men’s leisure wear.

gemini season color palette on The Numinous

 

The scents and flavors: Dazzlingly disorienting mixtures of synthetic and organic that both excite and confuse our olfactory sensibilities. Think Thierry Mugler’s ecstatically strange “Angel,” street meats, and unexpected snacks like lavender ice cream or nasturtium salad.  

gemini season on The Numinous

The healing: Mind-altering descents into the urban fray: think wandering flea markets and bazaars as we revel in cacophonous sensory mosaics; signing up for an off-the-beaten path walking tour or scavenger hunt; or maybe just brunching in a new neighborhood or sampling a fresh food truck.  

GEMINI SEASON BY SIGN :: COLOR PALETTES AND PRINCE JAMS!

With all four mutable signs playing a key role in the cosmic landscape of Gemini season, it’s a moment to don our mood rings and delight in chameleon color palettes as we let the full spectrum of visual and emotional luminescence into our apartments, makeup bags, and beyond. In the wise words of the Purple One: “I wish there was no black or white/I wish there were no rules.”  

:: ARIES ::
Gemini season invites you to experiment with energetic androgyny as you mix your masculine action principle with some radio tower receiving, and revel in the curious sensation of not having to commit to a particular end goal. Think color collisions fit for a tough yet bedazzled Jem from the Holograms.

Prince Anthem: “Cream”

Aries Colors

:: TAURUS ::
Gemini season invites you to quicken your pace and get out into the melee as you let your tightly-held values collide with alternate belief systems. Infuse your usual chocolate truffle palette with the levity of some candied Jordan almond pastels.

Prince Anthem: “Pink Cashmere”

Taurus Colors

:: GEMINI ::
Gemini season invites you to celebrate the full expression of your circulatory, winged sociability while also finding some ballast to soothe your nervous system. Activate your inner Rainbow Brite with Skittles shades and playground primaries.

Prince Anthem: “Controversy”

Gemini Colors

:: CANCER ::
Gemini season invites you to break up calcified habitual patterns and practice voicing your emotional needs directly. Radicalize and renovate your clam shell with electric neons fit for an 80s prom queen Ariel.

Prince Anthem: “When Doves Cry”

Cancer Colors

:: LEO ::
Gemini season invites you to practice glowing brightly without having to stand at the center of the action, as you trust in an individualism that doesn’t need to be spotlighted. Let your full-on solar power kick back under a Capri sun with summer sorbet shades and limoncello yellow.

Prince Anthem: “Raspberry Beret”

Leo Colors

:: VIRGO ::
Gemini season invites you to celebrate the dazzling dance of information gathering without having to worry about developing expertise. Honor the ever-unfolding spectacle with ballet slipper pinks and mint julep shades fit for a midsummer night’s dream.

Prince Anthem: “Nothing Compares 2 U”

Virgo Colors

:: LIBRA ::
Gemini season invites you to say yes to both ends of the spectrum and to infuse your high-minded idealism with some “beginner’s mind” buoyancy that’s deliciously judgement free. Conjure newness with clean slate greys and an unexpected splash of sparkling limeade.

Prince Anthem: “Diamonds & Pearls”  

Libra Colors

:: SCORPIO ::
Gemini energy invites you to explore fusing your “go deep or go home” mentality with a fresh curiosity that can contain both gravitas and levity. Old Hollywood femme fatale enters the technicolor age with a palette that trades vampy purple for ombréd lilacs as you play with varying levels of potency.

Prince Anthem: “Private Joy”

Scorpio Colors

:: SAGITTARIUS ::
Gemini season invites you to celebrate the “unknown” with in the known as you infuse your sense of far-flung adventurism with a little local exploration. With a rare succession of two Full Moons in your sign this season, it’s a moment for colors that conjure nocturnal howling, lunar metals, and the air that fans your bonfire.  

Prince Anthem: “Little Red Corvette”  

Sagittarius Colors

:: CAPRICORN ::
Gemini season invites you to mix your proclivity for wise maturity and getting the job done with some juicy, youthful playtime. Deck your life out with a boss lady leisure palette perfect for yacht parties and transcontinental jet setting.

Prince Anthem: “Sign O’ The Times”

Capricorn Colors

:: AQUARIUS ::
Gemini season invites you to sample the infinite array of possible perspectives without having to commit to a credo. Summon your prismatic potentials with colors fit for splashing in a forest pool or climbing to the top of some magically elven tree where you can just sit back and let it all be.

Prince Anthem: “1999″

Aquarius Colors

:: PISCES ::
Gemini season invites you to balance your penchant for continuous emotional intake with a little intellectual detachment and some soft-focus solitary retreat. Relish shades of wine, roses, and terracotta as you let this rich, grounded palette soothe some of this season’s mutable madness.

Prince Anthem: “Purple Rain”

Pisces Colors

TAROTSCOPES: MAY 2016

Posted on by Lindsay Mack

Cast by Lindsay Mack, using The Starchild Tarot.

:: TAURUS – Ten of Cups ::

Sweet Taurus, are you appreciating all that you’ve worked so hard for? Are you allowing yourself to be present for the goodness in your life? Are you savoring the loveliness of the moment? Sacred, sacred gratitude: this is the best birthday gift you could give yourself, Taurus. Bowing to yourself in profound love and appreciation. Looking at your life and seeing how far you’ve come. Drop the story about all that you don’t have and just be here for this moment.

As cliché as it sounds, this life is like a beautiful sunset; it flashes by so quickly. If you’re unconsciously living out the story that you don’t have all you need, you can miss the beauty that’s right in front of you. This is a month to appreciate all that you’ve worked for, grown through, earned and learned. Celebrate all that is here, all that is shifting and changing. Celebrate yourself, Taurus. You deserve it immensely.

The power and the lesson in this monthly journey for you, Taurus, is that the brain/ego can be VERY devoted to this idea that we need more than we already have in order to be happy. The ego also loves the idea that we are not enough, that we are not deserving. A newfound commitment to gratitude, joy and presence in genuine moments shatters these chains, setting you free into a new paradigm of self-love.

Its been a VERY intense few months for you, Taurus; this month feels like its weaving together all that’s been released, and all that’s been gained in the recent evolutionary shifts, welcoming you back to the awe inspiring beauty of the moment. To begin to practice gratitude, start with some simple mindfulness exercises or a walking meditation. Doing so will start to rewire those powerful and untrue beliefs that the ego holds so dear, leaving you much more present and spontaneous.

Ten of Cups is a flash of perfect joy and gratitude – one of those moments where it feels so beautiful to be alive. Those perfect, shining flashes of Ten of Cups gratitude are little gateways home to the present moment. So lean into these sweet and precious moments, Taurus. Be awake for them. Put your phone down, drop your story and just BE. Quietly celebrate all that you are, how far you’ve come and all that is here now. It is your birthright.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: GEMINI – Ace of Crystals ::

Geminis are walking a funny, funky paradigm this month. You’re being asked to be open, yet do nothing. It sounds a little crazy, but there really is a method to the madness. Firstly, this is a month where it would be wise for you to FULLY retreat into your cocoon, Gemini. Show up for work, travel when you need to, do whatever you have to do, but don’t overextend. Don’t over offer. Lean into the medicine of the retrogrades fully and completely.

Let this be a time of gentle self examination and self evaluation. Say yes to what’s here, but don’t add any more logs to the fire. Instead, commit to going inward. This is the “do nothing” piece from the paragraph above. There is plenty to focus on, honor, resolve, expand through and work on right now. Doing “nothing” will enable you to be present for all that is already here. It will also help you to actually be available for the invitation of the retrograde, to surrender to it instead of fighting it. As the saying goes, “do nothing and nothing will be left undone.”

YET – you’re moving through Ace of Crystals. Ace of Crystals is a fresh and beautiful gift. Aces are like a marriage of the light and ephemera of The Fool and the incredible manifestation energy of The Magician. There’s an alchemy to them that really presents a transformative opportunity. The Ace of Crystals is going to be beautiful for Geminis this month. This particular card can show up as a physical, literal gift or a totally invisible, energetic one. In order to receive it, Gemini must be open, which rounds out the fullness of the invitation for you this month. Be open, yet do nothing.

Ace of Crystals, regardless of the form it takes, is a seed at heart. And as one seed can create an entire garden; one child can create an entire legacy. Seeds are important, precious, and require our attention. This is why Gemini must walk the line of being open and doing no thing in May. If you overextend yourself, there won’t be room in your garden for the gifts that are dropping in for you. The retrograde is actually making it possible for you to be in this place of newness. Embrace it, be present, be flexible, and weed your garden in preparation for all that is to come.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: CANCER – Two of Crystals ::

It is all about personal boundaries for Cancer this month. Say no when you need to, carve out space, give back whatever you’ve been holding for people in your life. Sweep the slate clean, and be gently unapologetic about it. Honor your truth. Two of Crystals is a powerful time when we are juggling something precious – a new career, a new life change, our children, our job, etc. It represents a time of very hard work, important work: our work in the world.

This work requires the fullness of your attention. It represents a time when you just don’t have as much space, time or attention to offer to other things or people in your life outside those big commitments. This is absolutely appropriate for you right now, Cancer. You DON’T have space for lesser things right now. So speak your truth and kindly communicate this. Then, and this is the most important piece, be gracious enough to let those people or things tantrum about your “no.” Its their stuff, not yours. You don’t own anyone an explanation. Just send compassion their way, and keep doing your thing.

But the key for you this month isn’t just to focus on the work at hand, Cancer. It isn’t just to master your boundaries, although that’s a big part of it. It’s the willingness to release your perceptions of being a hero or a savior to those in your life who are struggling and identified in their own victimhood. I know this can be difficult to hear, but any time we are holding someone up because we believe they cannot hold themselves on their own, we are enabling them. When we DO NOT have the personal space (and you don’t this month, Cancer), it doesn’t help these other people or situations: it drains you as it enables them.

Love the people in your life enough to give them back whatever weight you’re carrying for them on their behalf. It’s the truest gift you could give them as a friend, a child, a parent, or a colleague. And so, if you feel dread, fear, anger or resistance towards a project, person or situation, it’s time to gently pause your involvement with it, or let them know your plate is full and they’ll hear from you when you have more personal space. Trust that if it’s in your highest and best, it’ll be in theirs too.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: LEO – Five of Swords ::

Be so, so gentle with yourself this month, Leo. Like Gemini, this is a time to do far less than you’ve been doing, and go inward. Your focus this month is to re-center yourself. Your health, energy and wellbeing depend upon it. Five of Swords energy is a sting and a bummer. Often, the card can arise when we are fully faced with a rough consequence to an impulsive decision. It can result in a situation or a realization where we are contracted and full of regrets and self-defeat. But it doesn’t always have to feel this way.

This energy is related to April’s Tarotscope for you, too. Last month, you received some wisdom to be sure in your decisions; to not let looks or the surface of a situation fool you. Now there’s an opportunity to deeply and beautifully evolve from that place. Firstly, if you DO NOT feel this sense of defeat or contraction, then rest easy. It is not a prediction that you are going to feel terrible. The wisdom of the month will serve you regardless. Secondly, if you DO feel like you’re fully enmeshed in Five of Swords energy, then this will help you to really make peace with that experience.

May’s invitation for you, dear Leo, and the true medicine of the Five of Swords, is to master how to re-center in your life without judgment. Plain and simple. If you cheat on your partner, admit it and start to rebuild. If you relapse, call your AA sponsor and get to a meeting. If you binge, forget to take your medicine, spend all of your money, just come back to YOU. There is no final nail in the coffin in this life; you don’t have to repent or self-flagellate, you don’t have to beg for forgiveness. You’re a human and humans are supposed to get messy.

Frankly, we’re supposed to screw up – so forget the stories of how we just can’t get it right. We’re supposed to walk the edges of cliffs and evolve through our falls, our foibles and misanthropic choices. Its okay to make a bad call, or to experience regret. Just don’t add the energy of self-judgment to the pain and discomfort you may be in already, Leo. Re-center and take responsibility for yourself. No story, no judgment. Make amends – either to another or to yourself. Be sweet and gentle. All things heal in time.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: VIRGO – Eight of Swords ::

You are no longer trapped in the prison of your mind, Virgo. A transformation has taken place, and a new way is available for you. In many alchemical and powerful ways, you are free. This is a mental shift that will have a massive and beautiful impact on all aspects of your life this month. It might be largely invisible and subtle to those around you – but for you, Virgo, its like a veil has been lifted. For the last few months, Virgos have been “waking up” more profoundly than any other sign.

A total paradigm shift has been occurring, and the landscape has been changing hugely. This wakeup is exactly what Eight of Swords is all about. In this card, we go through a totally transformative process: we stop believing the story of our mind. The blinders come off completely in this card – or at least, this is possible if we go all the way with this invitation. Virgos really experienced this in April, and began to see the possibility and flexibility of their power through this new lens. In May, Virgo begins to embody this shift.

You were never trapped, Virgo: you only believed you were. Now you know you aren’t, so what will you do with your “one wild and precious life?”, as Mary Oliver says. That full and beautiful question is the centerpiece of this month for you, Virgo. It is powerful to consider. You are no longer imprisoned by your mind. So what will you do with all this freshness, space and energy? It is possible that this month could hold huge changes for you, all based in joy and empowerment. Because you can now see clearly, it will be simple to see when this is available some capacity. There’s no more trepidation, just celebration.

A good word of wisdom for Virgo is to lean into the retrogrades and surrender to their energies. The Mercury retrograde – your ruling planet – is particularly important for you guys. Go within and do quiet work on yourself. Clear and clean up old patterning, beliefs and situations that result any time you have believed yourself to be in a prison of your mind. It is going to be a very loving, potent and joyful process for you this month, Virgo. Embrace it with all you are.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: LIBRA – Queen of Swords ::

Sweet Libra, pause before you speak, share, commit, assume, or accuse this month. Pausing is both your prayer and the answer to it. Pause, inquire, self reflect, THEN speak. You’ll be going on a lot of inner journeys with your communication this month. Trust this deeply and let it unfold. Let your process be more silent than it’s ever been, and hang out in the Void of that space. The reason for this is simple: Libras tend to leak verbally and mentally when they feel lost and scared. Right now, you guys are in the death portion of a massive birth-death-birth cycle.

The death part is totally a time of unknowns, which is when the ego can try to grasp onto anything that feels familiar or comfortable to abate this fear. What I gently invite you to consider this month, is that the grasping is actually preventing you from cycling all of the way into your rebirth stage. The grasping is just the ego, the part of the brain that wants to feel ground under its feet. And part of how you guys enable this grasping and sense of safety is through your mental and verbal brilliance. Right now, though, this gift is going through its own upgrade, and it’s a time for far less speaking, and much more inquiry so that the cycle can complete itself.

So resist speaking or communicating about the STORY of what you’re going through, and instead allow the fullness of your vulnerability to shine through. Let yourself say that you don’t know. That you are scared. Lost. Shine a light with your words so that they may be clarified, set free by the truth. Queen of Swords is a master communicator. She’s able to slice through any doubt, confusion or fear, and speak from the depths of the heart. She is, after all, water and air. Queen of Swords is your sacred guide for this work. But to access her, you must pause and stop the “leak”.

If you’re scared, pause. If you feel victimized, pause. If you feel slighted, angry or frustrated, pause. Pausing will give you the space to move through the experience of your feelings and emotions (water), and the frenzy of your thoughts (air), until you come to a middle place. So much healing, clarity, illumination, and evolution will be borne from that place. Let your mantra be, “pause”.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: SCORPIO – Justice ::

Scorpio has living up to its reputation the last few months, standing at the doorway of one sacred death/rebirth after another. So much evolution is happening for you, Scorpio, and this month holds one of the most profound energies for you thus far. Justice is a powerful Major Arcana card, and could also be understood as the embodiment of the concept of “karma.” Karma is the simple understanding that whatever is here is supposed to be here. Whatever is here is bringing a gift. This is Justice, and the invitation that it brings.

So whatever happens for you this month, Scorpio, is exactly what is supposed to be happening. There are no accidents or mistakes, especially not when we are in Justice energy. Your work this month will be moving through your own process of accepting, understanding, and even embracing this. It is only when we can accept what the present moment brings that we are free to change it. It’s time to take a step back and evaluate your life through the blind eyes of Justice. Can you find the medicine, the gift, the purpose and the function of whatever is here for you?

There’s a reason why there’s a sword on most Justice cards, and it feels important for you this month, Scorpio. We can think of this as the presence of the suit of Swords in the Tarot, which is all about mastering brain chemistry. Justice can be very difficult for the ego and brain. Sometimes Justice revolves around something hard or difficult to “understand.” Other times, it can come up around stuff that is so amazing, so beautiful, that we have a hard time believe that its true or will last.

The feelings around Justice are the wounds to tend to – so d some psychic surgery and remove any untrue beliefs. The work for you this month goes right to the bone, right to the heart. Trust that this is bringing a gift and a treasure, even if you cannot see it. The way we can start to swim in the current of Justice is to go outside. Every tree, bee, flower, weed, every animal whispers the truth of this life to us, if we can lay down and listen. Nothing is permanent, everything brings a gift, everything has its place in the Great Web. You must touch this wild place, Scorpio, in order to see the parallels in your life, too.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: SAGITTARIUS – The Sun ::

Dear Sagittarius, this month is filled with so much sweetness for you! So much light, gratitude and joy. It is going to feel like a massive weight has left your shoulders. So much is sloughing off of you; lots of karmic stuff is cycling out, and it can’t come a moment too soon. You’ve been asked to be in the dark about some things for a long while, Sagittarius, and this month is truly a burst of understanding and clarity around areas that might have had you confused for years. It’s a big, big time. Think new relationships, new career, new expansions. The sky is the limit.

There will be answers, illumination and breakthroughs that will rock your world this month. There’s just one teeny, tiny, little invitation in order to swim in all of this beauty: Vulnerability. This is the key that unlocks the door. This is your final frontier, Sagittarius. Understanding and truly embodying the fact that vulnerability isn’t a weakness – its one of the sexiest things about you. It’s the truth that moves mountains, changes hearts, softens minds and shifts your karma. Now, you guys can be as sweet and as vulnerable as they come, except in certain situations. And it’s in these areas where you can allow your knees to bend a bit, and your heart to crack.

You will know what I’m talking about, because it is probably the area you’re already getting defensive about upon reading this! Your bravado and confidence is amazing when its authentic, but distances you from the light and warmth of The Sun when it’s a mask. Shake the ground from underneath you with your vulnerability; it’ll change your life, especially this month.

You’re getting massive gifts in May, regardless of this invitation into softness and vulnerability. But to take it all the way, let yourself crack when you need to. By doing so, its almost like you’re opening yourself enough to receive what you’ve been asking and praying for. It feels very sacred, and very internal. Allow yourself to go on this holy journey toward the light. Expect relief this month, too. Any of the stuff that’s been in the works, unspoken, unfinished will come to a blissful conclusion now. You guys are making so much room for the new, the light, and the beautiful. Just tie up these last pieces and you’ll be home free.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: CAPRICORN – Ten of Crystals, reversed ::

You’re going back to the drawing board in many ways this May, Capricorn, but this is totally appropriate for you. This is what the retrograde is for. You’ve been doing some massive, massive work on yourself, releasing and shoring up old beliefs that no longer serve. Like Sagittarius, you have also been asked to do a lot of this in the dark. It has been no easy feat, and you’ve shown up for it spectacularly. Now it’s time to truly rewire all of the foundational stuff that is not serving you, and that has outstayed its welcome. Its time to get back to basics, Capricorn, and do some work on the foundation of your life, beliefs and body.

A lot of this old foundation just doesn’t fit anymore. And so until you do this, nothing will be able to come in to your life that is a true harvest of what you deserve. This is the best news you could get right now. The retrogrades are specifically primed for this kind of work, a supportive rewiring. Be willing to be very present with this more internally focussed time. It won’t last, and it is crucial to your growth and ability to receive.

Ten of Crystals is a beautiful card, a gorgeous and powerful reaping of all our hard work. You received the Ten of Pentacles reversed. This isn’t bad, but it is an important distinction from the right side up interpretation of the card. The reversal indicates that you’re almost to that glorious, gorgeous harvest, but not quite. The image I am getting is like a highway running parallel to another highway, separated by a concrete divider. If you attempted to merge over, you would crash. But if you drive until the next turnoff, exit your highway and merge onto the parallel one, you’ll be home free. It’s the process of the merging, the turning and the reentry that is the key.

Go through the full healing and rewiring process, Capricorn. Resist the temptation to just crash “through” the divider. There is a much gentler, easier, more fruitful way to wake up. Look right into the heart of your untrue and outdated beliefs. Stop just intellectualizing them; make concrete changes. Release bullshit distractions; really honor the work and process of the moment. Merge onto the aligned highway of your life.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: AQUARIUS – Three of Swords, reversed ::

This is a month of deep healing for you, Aquarius. The wounding you’ve been moving through, any pain that arose in April, will finally have space and time to be cleansed. This month is a sacred time to tend to deep cuts, to apply balm to slashes in the heart. To no longer break your own heart; but to make amends to yourself, and to resist exposing yourself to anything or anyone who is cruel, unkind or unsupportive of you. So spend lots of nourishing time in nature, put your phone in a drawer, and focus on healing. Heal whatever is left unresolved in your sweet heart, and keep moving toward the salvation of renewed growth.

You guys have been shifting, changing and moving so fast that you haven’t had enough time to process any grief or hurt from the last few months. That’s been totally aligned, but it is now the perfect time to do this internal healing work. This month, you’ll finally have space to not only heal, but to find joy and lightness again. This is the invitation of this retrograde for you; space, clearing and renewal. Healing in order to create space is the key to this month for you, Aquarius.

Three of Swords can be a very painful energy to move through. It can portend heartache, heartbreak, wounding, and drama. It’s a huge mental energy, too; lots of beliefs and thoughts that don’t serve. But because you got this card reversed, Aquarius, the pain of this card is behind you. It is already over. The storm has passed; now you must rebuild. There is a reemergence that is so beautiful with this card reversed. You are truly going through a rebirth, Aquarius.

Be in and around fresh water as much as you can. Bathe, cleanse, and wash yourself in the water of lakes, rivers and streams if possible. Treat yourself kindly during this time. Take naps, go slowly, let things be as soft, as gentle and as deep as they can get. Really up your time in nature, too. Make this a very nourishing experience. This wound clearing for Aquarius might go back years. Whatever has been left unexamined is now ready to be looked at and squeezed out. Trust this time, trust all that its bringing to you, and keep allowing it to releasing layer upon layer of shrapnel from your soul, leaving you whole and new again.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: PISCES – Nine of Wands ::

There are some powerful journeys in store for you this month, Pisces. Journeys of the heart, the mind and the soul. These journeys are all beautiful, but intense, and will absolutely take up a great deal of your energy this month. It is the last big expansion of energy for you before a period of well deserved rest this summer. The key with Nine of Wands is to take breaks when you need them. It’s a lot of work, movement and effort to travel through this card’s energy. So go slowly, and ask for help when you desire it.

You do not have to be an island, sweet Pisces. Open your heart, speak your truth, and believe you’re worthy of help and a kind ear. This has really been, frankly, what the last few months have been about for you guys. Getting you to ask for help; to open your heart to community, and to be seen in a way that is really powerful. Those of you who have allowed yourself to be more vulnerable and available to assistance have been receiving it in incredible ways. There have been big, big time shifts and gifts for Pisceans who have asked for help and guidance along the way.

For those of you who are still locked in your victimhood, your mental stories about what is fair or unfair, I gently invite you back to your truth. To the shining, beautiful truth of your special, unforgettable and wonderful nature, Pisces. Nine of Wands, no matter where you are, will be a road home. A road back to your truth, to your path, and to your goals. In order to reach them, you must, must, must, must go gently and slowly. Pace yourself; that’s the key with this card.

Take breaks when you need them, allow yourself to be held up and seen by people who you trust. Ask for whatever assistance you should need along the way and you will absolutely receive it. It is very important for you to speak your truth this month, too. If you have something to say, say it. If you have something to express, express it. Do not hide or suffer in silence. Share your experience and let yourself be seen. It’s the last big, effortful journey before some amount of regeneration and rest for you. Be willing to go the distance and leave the heaviness behind.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

:: ARIES – The Lovers ::

Seeing and being seen is the medicine of the moment for Aries this month. Expect some BIG personal shifts and upgrades around how you view and think about yourself, all for the better. But let’s start with what The Lovers is NOT: it is not necessarily a harbinger of new love, a rekindling of an old love, or a new relationship. It can be, but this isn’t the bottom line of the card. It’s not about another person or situation; when we are in The Lovers’ energy, the people around us become our mirrors. For you, Aries, the people around you will be deep and powerful reflectors of your truth, beauty, goodness and gifts this month.

This energy is being offered to you so that you can start seeing yourself as others see you. This isn’t an energy that just puffs the ego; the colors run really true, and very deep. There is a power to The Lovers that can radically and permanently shift our opinions and beliefs about ourselves. It all happens in alignment with the truth – and so in any area you have a false view of yourself, someone or something is going to reflect the truth to you. Now comes your opportunity to accept this invitation and embody it.

This whole year for Aries is going to be about upgrading old beliefs and evolving your view of yourself. It has been, up until this point, about healing and offering love and care to the nervous system. May offers some more blossoming and sweetness. April was a CRUNCHER of a month for Aries – so much ego eradication, stress and insecurity. This month, dive back into the truth. Do you know who you are? In April, I don’t know how many of you would have answered that you knew with confidence. This month is a different ballgame. The Lovers will help profoundly with this.

If you are not in a position where someone in your life is reflecting to you YOUR specialness, pay attention to those who YOU feel are beautiful. What you think is amazing in them is what is amazing about you too. If you’re falling in love with someone, you’re really falling in love with yourself. What you feel is special and wonderful about someone else, is in you, too. It’ll be a heart centered homecoming to the truth of your amazing nature, Aries. So dive in courageously, and let yourself see and be seen.

Want more wisdom? Book a reading with Lindsay here and follow her on Instagram.

INSTAPOETS: AN INTERVIEW WITH MARKUS ALMOND

Posted on by Kiran Gill

In a new series celebrating our favorite poets of IG, Kiran Gill talks to Markus Almond, author of Motivational Quotes To Get The Blood Moving, about the intersection of creativity and spirituality…

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 6.39.30 PM

 

The Numinous: You’re both a poet and a musician, how do these two worlds intersect? Is the creative process similar or different?
Markus Almond: They are pretty similar I think. Writing feels more natural to me. With music, I would have to fit a certain number of syllables into a melody and then sometimes make it rhyme. But with writing prose, I’m able to say exactly what I wanted to say without making it fit into an existing format.

TN: Where do you get the inspiration for your writing?
MA: The inspiration comes from different things depending on what I’m writing. Sometimes I’m just writing thinly veiled notes to myself or people I love. Other times, I’m telling a story or trying to pass on some sort of advice.

TN: What is your definition of spirituality?
MA: It’s that unexplainable power that you feel when you close your eyes and let go.

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 6.27.10 PM

TN: Do you have any daily rituals or practices to aid you in your writing?
MA: I meditate every day. And I listen to music in my headphones when I write. I prefer to write with the lights off and my office locked. It helps keep me focused on the task at hand. And I can usually only write at night after everyone else has gone to sleep.

TN: What was the impetus for putting your work out onto the Internet and becoming a published author?
MA: I was going through some personal stuff a few years ago. And I was so over-worked and tired of looking at a computer. So I bought this little manual typewriter and made a limited edition zine with some scissors, a glue stick, and a copy machine. It was the first thing I ever published. And people seemed to like it so I published some more, built a website and started writing books.

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 6.28.43 PM

TN: What life experiences have had the biggest impact on your work?
MA: Being a musician has probably had the biggest impact on me. That journey took me to so many different places (both spiritually and geographically) that there is just so much material to write from. I’ve got enough stories floating around in my head that it will take me the rest of my life to get them all down on paper.

TN: We love your existential take on self-help – are you a fan of any traditional self-help authors? Who and how has their work impacted you?
MA: Yeah, I read self-help books all the time. Right now I’m reading two books by Thich Nhat Hanh and also The 12 Week Year. I think books are like software for our brains so it’s important what we read. It can have a great impact on our lives if we read helpful things.

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 6.32.58 PM

TN: What do you hope your writing will inspire in people?
MA: Honestly, I hope that they’ll just email me once in a while and tell me I’m doing a good job. I don’t really write books for mass appeal or with the intention of selling a million copies. I write them because I enjoy writing. But still, it’s nice to know that people like them from time to time.

TN: What are the biggest challenges of being human? The greatest joys?
MA: Fear can be one of the biggest challenges. It can manifest itself in all kinds of weird ways. I think if you can learn to spot fear and get through it without stopping, you’ll go far in the world. The greatest joy of being human is probably different for everyone. For me, it’s those happy things that happen by accident. Sometimes lucky magic just crosses our path for no reason and that can bring a sense of joy.

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 6.39.30 PM

Read more at Brooklyntomars.com and follow Markus on Instagram @markusalmond

WEEKLY TAROTSCOPE: FEBRUARY 29 – MARCH 6

Posted on by Lindsay Mack

Our guest Tarotscopes queen, Lindsay Mack of Wild Soul Healing, has pulled Oppression (The Devil) for this week’s forecast! Don’t be scared – this is the perfect energy to help us face our demons ahead of next week’s detoxifying Pisces New Moon eclipse…

SIT WITH IT: A NEW WAY TO WORK WITH DEPRESSION

Posted on by Erin Telford

Depression can be a signal of deep discontent from your soul. As tough as it is, try diving into those feelings through meditation and self-reflection to clear your psyche, says Erin Telford…

a new way to work with depression rainbow in the dark by erin telford on The Numinous

 

“Winter is a great time for depression,” I joked at a Breathwork group last month. I was met with some very nervous giggles. As with most things, it’s only funny because it’s uncomfortably true.

All humor aside, I got really depressed last winter.

It wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling. The first time I remember feeling depressed was when I was about 14 years old. It felt like being trapped in a glass, banging on the walls with no one listening, fatigue and a vague sense of loss and hazy unmet needs.

When I started to sink down and enter that deep gray landscape, I just felt tired and defeated. You again? After all this work?

I was involved in a group-coaching program at the time. I was honest with everyone about the despair I was feeling. They came full force with the positivity. You got this! You just need a spa day! Self-care! Find your gratitude!

“Seriously?” I thought. I was surprised by how fiercely irritated I was with their advice. And it hit me. I did not want to be cheerled out of this. I wanted to go down into the dungeon of my psyche and find some f*cking answers.

My response to feeling depressed in the past was to wait until it was over. Back pedal out of the icky feelings. Utilize the usual anesthetics. Self-medication. Self-isolation. Online shopping. Staying busy. Hitting the crack pipe rabbit hole of social media.

This time needed to be different. I’m not a confused teenage girl anymore. I’ve been waking up for a long time and I have an arsenal of tools in my bag, perfect for this emotional renovation. So I made a commitment to going down and in – and not coming back out until I found what I was looking for.

So what did that look like in real life? I turned my phone off. I sat in my favorite spot in my apartment, this little nook with a bunch of plants, great light, and a big window, and I checked in. I sat with myself. I did some writing. I asked many times and in as many ways as I could, “what is underneath all of this pain?”

I was really gentle with myself. This line of inquiry did not involve self-criticism, curse words, belittling myself or my process or any feeling of needing to hurry up and get back to “normal” life. I did not take time off but I did give myself all of the time that I had and needed.

What I found was a deep well of sweetness for myself.

The supposed truth that had taken me down to these depths was uncovered as just another clever way that I had fooled myself into believing that I was separate, that I was unloved, that I was unsupported. I discovered that I had the power inside to be able to break a life long pattern by looking at my wounds with tender curiosity rather than frustration or disdain.

***

Depression is often framed as something that just happens to us like getting a cold or a bummer draw of a genetic card. While environment, brain chemistry, and family lineage can be part of long-standing major depression; many of us experience it simply as a response to what’s going on in our lives.

We sell ourselves short by saying, “I’m just depressed.” As if it has nothing to do with the emotional pain that we’ve endured, the unattended wounds, the countless hours spent confused and alone or in groups of people who fail to see or help our hurt. The real life existential crisis that is: “I was told this would make me happy and I’m not. That must mean something is wrong with me. “

Very few of us have been taught any kind of practical way to channel and work with emotional pain. Most likely the instruction we covertly receive is to tuck away the unlovable, messy parts of ourselves. Shove them way, way, way into the back of the closet so we never have to look at the shame or hurt or confusion we feel. Or, let anyone else see it!

There is a single seed of discontent within you that is begging to be acknowledged.

It could be linked to:

Wrong job
Wrong friends
Wrong city
Wrong relationship
Wrong environment
Wrong…paradigm

Only you know, and facing it down is what I call Constructive Depression. It will require your participation. It will require fierce internal responsibility. And it is your job and your job alone, since no-one else can connect to your deepest parts but you.

The longer you’ve been feeling this way, the more wildly uncomfortable you may be with the truth that is banging on the door of your heart, begging for bread and water. How honest are you willing to be with yourself when your wellbeing is on the line?

So how to you do this?

You can think of Constructive Depression as a soul expedition. So what do you need for an internal journey? Nutritious snacks, great music, paints, journals, talismans, crystals, instruments, quiet, something to burn away the energy. Gather all of your supportive resources.

This is not an intellectual exercise. This is a reckoning. You with you.

This is a slow immersive dip into your soul. A psychic cleansing. Mental decongestion. Moving toward rather than away. Your resistance to this idea is equal to your commitment that all of this is due to the outside rather than inside forces. You ARE up to the task.

We experience the full range of human emotions for a reason. We feel sad because something is breaking our heart. We feel angry because something isn’t right and it needs to change. We feel fear because we are threatened or being asked to expand.

Depression is an opportunity for internal exploration. You are not depressed because you are a bad person or you skipped too many days of yoga or gratitude journaling.

You are depressed because something is not working for you. There is a yearning. An emotional chasm. Something that is crying out to be witnessed and seen like it’s never been seen before. Our wounds are rarely greeted with the exact kind of care and response that we are craving. When we accumulate a lifetime of hurts that have gone unnoticed or unattended to by others, the responsibility falls back to us to determine what we need.

So meet yourself with all of the tenderness, all of the sweetness, the hugs, the love, and the acceptance that you hold within you. Go inside, find your golden nugget of truth, and only come back out when you are ready – holding your treasure high.

*Mental health can be very tenuous. If you feel like this is something you can safely undertake, please do. If it feels like too much, please seek professional support for this internal exploration.

@NUMINOUS_BOOKS