Anger

MY MYSTICAL LIFE: USING ARIES SEASON TO EXPRESS ANGER

Posted on by Ruby Warrington

The placement of Aries ruling planet Mars in our birth chart, can show how to express our anger in a healthy and progressive way …

My Mystical life Aries season express anger spiritual activism Ruby Warrington
Photo: Caitlin Mitchell

So here we are in Aries season, my birthday month. But I’ve never felt like a bone fide Aries. Bossy, sometimes. Sure I like to get my own way. But I’m not super confident. Far from confrontational. And definitely not aggressive.

When a life coach once asked about my big message for the world (the one I would shout from the top of a mountain if I had a megaphone that could be heard from Australia to the Arctic circle), I replied: Please, will everybody just stop fighting!

This was late 2016, my plea inspired by a summer of terrorist attacks and an backdrop of political warmongering. I guess I’m just a massive pacifist, I told her. Whereas Aries, ruled by passion planet Mars, is the warrior of the Zodiac. A hot-headed temper tantrum waiting to happen. The one leading the protest, shouting the slogans, and fighting for justice.

Rather, as I wrote in this piece, I see myself as a spiritual activist. On a mission to shift consciousness one open-hearted sharing circle at a time. Partly because, as Martin Luther King famously put it, I believe that “Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

But also, because I am terrified of conflict. To the point that for a long time I thought I didn’t feel any anger at all. FOR REAL. From my parents’ “amicable” divorce, to my grandmother’s silent acceptance of her husband’s affairs, somewhere along the line I internalized that anger is bad. Causes more trouble than it’s worth.

This is not uncommon, among women in particular. But it’s something I’ve been beating myself up about lately. Aren’t activist activists what the world needs? People getting right up in the face of injustice. Shouting and screaming and demanding change. It’s fine for me, comfortable in my straight, white, British privilege, to sit back and preach about healing the world with hugs.

But the truth is, we each have our own flavor of fight in us—as denoted by the position of Mars in our birth chart. And my Mars (ruler of my Aries Sun, and therefore flavoring my soul essence) is in Cancer, the softest, most sensitive sign. Meaning my anger often leaks out of me as tears. Since tears are a sign of weakness, crying is “ugly,” and makes other people extremely uncomfortable, it’s not surprising I learned to suppress this part of myself.

Understanding my Mars placement has helped me to accept that part of my activism is to enable an emotional and vulnerable expression of anger—particularly teaching that it’s okay to cry. As I often do now, freely and openly, whenever I speak publicly about anything that angers or otherwise moves me. After all, the purpose of anger is to inspire action for change.

A recent example of the power of our tears? The tear-streaked speech by 17-year-old Emma Gonzalez following the Parkland shooting in Florida. Her angry tears, anything but a sign of weakness, have helped motivate thousands to join the March For Our Lives in Washington this weekend (under a Waxing Quarter Moon in Cancer, no less).

Mars shows how we can express our anger—also how we can channel our passion, our actions, and our drive—in ways that feel healthy to us. All the time I wasn’t comfortable feeling my anger, I channeled my pent-up tears into my addictions. To alcohol, shopping, work, social media. The energy of anger has to go somewhere.

Don’t know your Mars sign? You can do your chart for free HERE.

We can also see how Mars expresses itself in our most powerful activists. Martin Luther King had his Mars in Gemini—the sign that rules communication and words. Nelson Mandela, Mars in Libra—sign of the diplomat. As for Rosa Parks? Mars in Capricorn. The patient, stoic, unflinching anger that can move mountains—also the sign Mars is currently visiting through May 16.

Regardless of your date of birth, your Mars sign shows where your inner Aries lives. Because no matter how our anger is expressed, that there is a warrior in each and every one of us.

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March For Our Lives takes place in Washington DC on March 24, with over 800 local events happening worldwide. On April 4, Black Lives Matter, The Peace Accelerators and a host of others, will march through Harlem, NY in remembrance of Martin Luther King Jnr. Join them HERE.

On behalf of all those who support The Numinous and allow us to do our work, we will also be donating 10% of sales all from our Total Guide To Your Mars Sign course to gun safety movement Everytown.

EMPOWERED ACTION IN THE FACE OF TRAUMA

Posted on by Louise Androlia

Recent world events have stirred up many emotions. Louise Androlia shares her wisdom on how to use our feelings as a catalyst for empowered action…. Images: Katya Volpato

empowered action people hugging by Katya Volpato on The Numinous

Recent world events have left many of us feeling traumatized, whether or not we’ve been directly affected by acts of mass violence. These are turbulent times, and having been working on my own path to trauma recovery recently, I feel called to share some thoughts on how to work on being present in reality—but at the same time not becoming immobilized by fear.

At the root of it all, whether facing our own crisis or confronted with mass crisis, the difficult art to master is that it is safe to feel our feelings and continue to connect, especially when we feel as though it would be wiser to shut down.

The strong emotions being stirred up among switched on communities now are actually a valuable call to action. Here are some ways we can use them—while avoiding losing our connection to our highest selves, or getting swept up in the hype.

THE EMOTION: Overwhelmed
THE GUIDANCE: You can’t save the whole world at once
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Focus your attention

Pick something you currently feel very passionate or perhaps frightened about, and then learn and feel your way through it. Endless browsing through social media feeds may make you feel more frustrated because you also end up reading the comments, which can lead to yet more overwhelm. Instead, choose to focus on your chosen subject and learn all you can. Yes this will be hard if you are used to endless scrolling—because as well as learning, you are re-training your mind to be present.

THE EMOTION: Fear
THE GUIDANCE: Catastrophizing only fuels the fears
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Get involved in local politics and community

Looking on Facebook lately, all I’ve seen is people screaming into the Internet abyss about the apocalypse and giving fuel to their own fear and sadness in the process. This helps no one, including you. So look at how you can actually get involved within your community, and if you don’t see anything obvious, start something. It is so easy to just say ‘Fuck the world’. But this is not the time to give up. It’s time to shout louder, IRL, and to remember your voice and your vote DOES count.

THE EMOTION: Anger
THE GUIDANCE: Do not fight fire with fire
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Feel your anger; then channel it into positive action

The elements can always teach us something—for example, anger is a fire element emotion, while compassion and feelings are water element emotions. And you don’t put out a forest fire by setting another part of the forest on fire! Action, and so activism, is a positive channel for anger, and if what’s needed now is more of the water element, become an activist for love, compassion, equality, empathy, and connection.

empowered action people hugging by Katya Volpato on The Numinous

THE EMOTION: Grief
THE GUIDANCE: It is safe to feel your feelings
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Explore and nurture your shadow side

Man of us are experiencing a huge collective sense of grief, coming in all forms, and for anybody not used to this emotion, this level of pain can seem very frightening to the mind, body and spirit. This is not a time to numb the pain, but instead an opportunity to dive deeper in your own self-inquiry practice. Checking out of reality serves no one, including you. Allow yourself to acknowledge and feel all the fears that have arisen recently and know that it is okay to do so. It can sometimes feel like our own personal crises are not ‘bad’ enough to warrant being the focus of our compassion—but ignoring your own pain will leave you unable to serve. By learning to compassionately address what is currently coming up for you, then you are actually helping to heal the collective and creating connection between yourself, your peers and those strangers you are really feeling for.

THE EMOTION: Helplessness
THE GUIDANCE: Re-connect to yourself
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Take a media break

First of all, avoid watching or reading the mainstream news on a loop. Studies show that when we keep recycling the news over and over we are re-traumatizing constantly. And the more scared we feel, the more helpless we can feel. To be able to start being of service it is essential that we learn to reconnect to our selves, as once back in the present moment we feel more stable to help others. I’ve also lost count of how many people I hear saying they wish they could use social media less, as this can have a similar way of hooking us into judgment and fear, and distancing us from our own truths. The great news is…you can!

Some easy ways to start:

  • Leave your phone at home and go for a walk in your neighborhood.
  • Put your phone on airplane mode at night.
  • Create a ‘no social media after ***pm’ rule.
  • Log out of all your social media channels on your computer and phone. This means that when you go to use them you become aware that you have to login. This allows using them to become intentional.
  • Move your social icons on your phone to a folder and put it on the last page of scrolling. Again this means you CHOOSE when to look rather than it just being there.
  • Do not read the comments. I repeat DO NOT READ THE COMMENTS.

These small actions may feel massively uncomfortable, and if so, good. If you feel anxious without your phone, good. The present moment will continue to feel painful until you learn to be IN it. And look how much time you now have! What would you like to do with it? I suggest reconnecting to PLAY. Connecting with your inner child is another way to ease anxiety and help you reconnect to your natural energy of love and connection. When you refresh your true north, you are more likely to be able to shift your helplessness into self-love.

empowered action people hugging by Katya Volpato on The Numinous

THE EMOTION: Frustration
THE GUIDANCE: Express yourself in the way that works for you
THE EMPOWERED ACTION: Show don’t tell

It can be really hard to express yourself in a way that you feel helps, especially when you’re angry and upset. It’s good to remember that we rarely get our point across when we try and force it upon someone and so preaching doesn’t usually feel good. You will always feel better when you can express yourself articulately and if you find it difficult to feel confidence with expressing yourself with words, remember also that you can always just BE the change. We always positively affect those around us with our behavior. So think: what small steps can you take in your day-to-day life that will provide example of the kind of world you’d like to live in?

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A Final Word on Black Lives Matter. Vs All Lives Matter.

This is an argument that’s been raging, and below are a few of my favorite simple ways to explain the situation to someone who is having trouble understanding. It is part of human nature to make everything about ourselves (regardless of the topic) since in times of trauma our survival instinct kicks in. But it’s important to learn to recognize that not EVERYTHING is about us. The more that we can see ourselves connected to everyone else, the more empathy we can ignite.

  • “When we say ‘Save the Rainforests’, it doesn’t mean that all other forests suck.”
  • “Choosing to go to a rally for Breast Cancer does not mean that Liver Cancer is less important.”
  • “Saving an animal that’s about to go extinct does not mean that other animals aren’t important, it just means that right now, this one needs our help.”
  • “Yes, of course all lives are important, but currently it doesn’t feel like black lives are as important as other lives—and until the world is equal, meaning ALL people receive the same level of kindness and judicial treatment, then we need to speak up.”
  • “Choosing to support black lives does not mean your life is any less significant.”

You get the idea.

SHADOW EMOTION: HOW TO WORK WITH ANGER

Posted on by Erin Telford

Mars retrograde stirring up any suppressed…rage (um, Lemonaid)? You can use your anger as a powerful tool for transformation, says Erin Telford…

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Anger is my favorite shadow emotion. It’s powerful, it gets things done and it is excellent at creating boundaries and change.

But anger is also one of the most misunderstood and underutilized emotions. As women, we are socialized in both overt and covert ways to be nice, not make a fuss and not rock the boat. When we are taught by our loved-ones and by our culture to bite our tongue in service of keeping the peace, we can get very disconnected from trusting our feelings and from feeling safe to work with this emotion when it flares up.

The thing is, most of us have never seen a healthy expression of anger. We associate it with road rage, throwing things at people, screaming, crying, cursing, fear, abuse, physical threats, danger, and out of control people. These are all examples of unhealthy anger. It’s not an emotion we appreciate so we try our very best to suppress it out of existence.

But it’s actually unexpressed or suppressed anger can get ugly. And beyond the stigma, all anger is, is a catalyst for change and an opportunity for some honest communication. Anger can actually work for you if you work with it.

Anger in its purest form simply says: “I don’t like this. Something needs to be different about this situation.” It’s a call to action! You don’t like it? Okay, change it!

One of the best examples of healthy anger is peaceful protest. This is anger put to work—a group of people turning their collective anger into action to create change. We are seeing this right now in politics, the environment, and human rights. It is impossible for anyone with a beating heart to turn a blind eye to what is going on in our world. We are riled up, expressing our opinions and getting involved!

We can all do this in our personal lives as well. Anger is a very powerful force and if wielded with grace and finesse, it can move mountains. Where we get into trouble with anger is when we push it down, causing it to build.

Anger is connected with the season of spring. This is because it speaks to the catalytic energy surge required to turn a seed into a plant, to push it’s little head above the soil and reach for the sun! Spring, our liver, and by association the energy of anger, are connected with upward and outward growth.

So what happens if your growth is inhibited? What happens when someone tells you “no”? A ridiculous new policy is created at work? What if you are simply just trying to walk down the street and everyone is in your way? You didn’t get the apartment or the job or the acceptance letter, a flight is delayed, a class isn’t offered, you didn’t get the promotion?

These are ways that an obstacle interrupts the smooth flow of our life. We don’t like obstacles. We don’t like no. We don’t like interruptions to our plans.

And so our natural reaction can be anger. Which is totally fine. We are upset.

But to deny this is to block our access our personal power. When we feel guilty about what we feel or label ourselves as being “negative” when we feel angry, we miss out on an opportunity to out-create our circumstances.

Rather, if we can sit with our anger, can look at where it’s coming from and why we feel it, we can polish it into a nugget of transformational gold. If we have been hurt or upset by another person, rather than lashing out, we can advocate for ourselves and clearly state our needs to that person. If someone continually disrespects or hurts us, you may need to use that anger to create a change in the terms of that relationship!

You may have heard that anger turned inward results in depression—an oversimplified expression, since depression has many roots and takes many forms—but there is some weight to it.

When we repress our anger toward a partner, friend, loved one or co-worker by not sharing our truth, we are betraying ourselves. We are inadvertently communicating to ourselves that our feelings don’t matter and we are not worth standing up for. Self-betrayal is the most painful betrayal of all and can decrease self-esteem and confidence—leading to depression.

So we stay snippy and unexpressed and we self-medicate even more or our tense up even more, or our digestion suffers. It doesn’t have to be this way. Use your anger as a call to action to change your circumstances.

Breathe it out. Dance it out. Run it out. Write it out. Scream it out (not at someone else!) Sing it out. Create it out. Talk it out. Paint it out. Boot camp it out. Express it out.

You have to feel it to heal it. You have to let it out to transform it. Just don’t be afraid of anger.

The more you know your triggers and can feel when it’s rising in you, the more gently and safely you can manage this emotion. Anger is so powerful and properly harnessed it can do so much for you. Think of anger as your inner Mama Bear, your inner Kali, and your inner badass.

And let it be fuel to create powerful change and transform your life.

INTENSELY FELT: GET TO KNOW YOUR SCORPIO MOON SIGN

Posted on by Ash Bonelli

Those born with a Scorpio Moon sign feel life more intensely than most, says Ash Baker. Artwork: Prince Lauder via Behance.net

Scorpio moon sign image by Prince Lauder on The Numinous

Calling all with a Scorpio Moon sign. Let’s dive into the deep waters where your heart centered luminary resides. The Moon reflects our deepest emotions, our reactions and instincts, and where we need and seek comfort in life – and the lunar Scorpio is intense. Not only in your needs, but how you get those needs met.

The Scorpion Moon sign comes with a super power to see past any illusion and go for a direct hit if it means getting to the truth of any situation, and people lacking the bravery to be honest won’t get far with you. The Scorpio Moon sign is drawn to intense people, situations and environments. You seek drama on some level, whether you like it or not, and all because of an innate drive to transform . A Scorpio Moon sign understands better than any that you must shake the foundation until it crumbles so you can build it better than before.

This need will play out in totally different areas of your life depending upon which house your Moon is located in your birth chart. But any which way, embracing this strong need for emotional intensity will be key to accepting yourself. Finding healthy ways to release this intense energy can help relieve it while still honoring this side of yourself.

This is also a very psychic Moon. With the laser like ability to hone in on the truth, you just know things you really should not. This level of knowingness gives you an emotional upper hand. You possess a level of confidence that will entice others to deeply confide in you, or else you’ll scares the hell out of them. And the Scorpio Moon sign is happy knowing everything about you, while you know very little about them. These are private creatures.

The shadow side of knowing everybody’s secrets is that you also know you can get hurt, badly. Human nature can sting. This can lead to the Scorpio Moon sign creating a tough veneer, seemingly making those around them, especially lovers, jump through hoops to earn your trust and affection. You like to control for fear of losing it – at least if you’re in control you always know what’s coming. Yet even when disaster hits, this Moon will thrive on opportunity for yet another rebirthing experience.

This Moon may reside on the darker side, yet when in love, you will display a level of loyalty like no other. You will fight till the death for your own, and are ultimately a great ally. While it might seem the Scorpio Moon sign can play on negatives as a catalyst to help others, when galvanized into action you are unstoppable. Let’s look at some ways to bring out the best in the Scorpio Moon sign…

See projects through to completion. The Scorpio Moon sign feels emotional unrest if you don’t finish what you start. This goes for your career, home projects, and even your relationships. You do things with your whole heart, or not at all. There may also be the tendency to expect others to hold the same standards. But other people won’t always be so black and white about life. Work on practicing loving acceptance of yourself and others.

Honor your need for privacy. Having healthy boundaries around your need to be alone to connect with your higher self is key. This is something others need to respect about you too, as you may become quite defensive without a quiet space to retreat to. Scorpio’s mascot is literally the scorpion, who likes to hide in dark places until they feel safe to come out. Your emotional Moon is quite the same. Knowing that this is normal for you is another positive step in healthy self-acceptance.

Seek the truth but leave room for the light. You don’t shy away from the darker side of life, and while admirable, this can lead a person to expect to find negativity more often than not. Spend time around people, places and get involved in experiences that show you how good life can be. It can be a cruel world out there, but it can be an amazing love-filled one too. Volunteer for a charity that speaks to you, working with others to make positive changes. Spend time with kids or animals, and witness unconditional love through the innocence of these beings. This will help your heart out next time you’re feeling cynical about the world.

Keep a journal. Write out your anger. Write out your sadness. Make a list of things you are grateful for. Use this space to get EMOTIONAL. Multiple studies have shown writing out your feelings brings a sense of control back into your life, so genuinely use this as a way to purge your intense inner stirrings. You could also see that some situations, if actively pursued, could lead to unnecessary strife. You seek intensity in life, and are strong enough to walk through the fire, but you have to pick your battles. Let it all out on the page instead, and keep your journal locked, tucked away or even under your bed. Prying eyes are death to the Scorpio Moon sign!

Your Moon is hugely valuable, as it can help others transform into better versions of themselves. Use your natural lunar abilities to light the way for others seeking their own much needed healing.

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